Job End 1: Insight
Question:
Of course, this is his own religion and/or thoughts coming out. Ones you shouldn’t have to buy into, known as discrimination.
Indeed! I could sue, but it wouldn’t make sense in this case. It’s better just to move on. I’m just saying he noticed some features of my anxiety disorder. He was very much out of line pushing his religion. He never did make it a demand – but, hey, he’s the boss! Trying to refute accusations is YOU standing up for yourself. That takes much courage at times.
Yes. However, I had said (and I’ve said it here, and in many other cases), that he had accused me of sexual harassment – which he never has. Admittedly he exagerrated something that wasn’t that big a deal, which is probably why I took it that way. Dennis — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm
Response:
Dennis, not wanting to adopt a person’s religion isn’t YOUR fault. You stated this early on in the job that they were pushing you to go to "their side". Don’t feel badly for that, please. You have your own opinions and you need to stick to them.
I fully agree. It’s mostly academic that he saw my anxiety disorder and misinterpreted it. I doubt that’s what he had/has, whatever his faults, he’s not obsessive. Dennis — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm
Response:
Hi, Dennis, Of course, this is his own religion and/or thoughts coming out. Ones you shouldn’t have to buy into, known as discrimination. Trying to refute accusations is YOU standing up for yourself. That takes much courage at times. smiles, Elise
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – To get some closure on my current job as it ends, I’ll write a few posts. I’ve had trouble with the boss, Dick, who wanted me to adopt his religion. He thinks I’m like he used to be, and that would be the solution. The biggest part of the time, I just dismissed that as pretext, that he just wanted to make a convert. However, I sometimes suspected that the negative character traits he sees in me are in fact my anxiety disorder. He’s notoriously vague, but during a confrontation a while back, he got mad and gave a few details, which confirm my latter thought. He said, "I never said my life was like yours! I just see you doing things with people that I used to do but don’t do any more. You mischaracterize things, you play people off against each other!" In context, "mischaracterizing things" means cognitive distortions, which general anxiety sufferers like me have. "Playing people off against each other" isn’t so clear. I was discussing the old complaints against me and how he had handled them. I’m obsessive, so I get lost in details. Also, I was trying to refute accusations that he had never really made – "mischaracterizations," in fact cognitive distortions. For a while I thought this was an apparent rather than a real problem, since I had in fact responded to peoples’ complaints effectively – as we’ve discussed here! However, if I don’t get him and the other managers to see it, that’s a problem in itself! I’ll ask him for more details, if the chance arises. This may be something I need to work on with my counselor. If I didn’t think I had personal problems, I wouldn’t be on ASAPM. It’s just that I wasn’t interested in his solution – his religion. Dennis — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm
– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm
Response:
To get some closure on my current job as it ends, I’ll write a few posts. I’ve had trouble with the boss, Dick, who wanted me to adopt his religion. He thinks I’m like he used to be, and that would be the solution. The biggest part of the time, I just dismissed that as pretext, that he just wanted to make a convert. However, I sometimes suspected that the negative character traits he sees in me are in fact my anxiety disorder. He’s notoriously vague, but during a confrontation a while back, he got mad and gave a few details, which confirm my latter thought. He said, "I never said my life was like yours! I just see you doing things with people that I used to do but don’t do any more. You mischaracterize things, you play people off against each other!" In context, "mischaracterizing things" means cognitive distortions, which general anxiety sufferers like me have. "Playing people off against each other" isn’t so clear. I was discussing the old complaints against me and how he had handled them. I’m obsessive, so I get lost in details. Also, I was trying to refute accusations that he had never really made – "mischaracterizations," in fact cognitive distortions. For a while I thought this was an apparent rather than a real problem, since I had in fact responded to peoples’ complaints effectively – as we’ve discussed here! However, if I don’t get him and the other managers to see it, that’s a problem in itself! I’ll ask him for more details, if the chance arises. This may be something I need to work on with my counselor. If I didn’t think I had personal problems, I wouldn’t be on ASAPM. It’s just that I wasn’t interested in his solution – his religion. Dennis — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – To get some closure on my current job as it ends, I’ll write a few posts. I’ve had trouble with the boss, Dick, who wanted me to adopt his religion. He thinks I’m like he used to be, and that would be the solution. The biggest part of the time, I just dismissed that as pretext, that he just wanted to make a convert. However, I sometimes suspected that the negative character traits he sees in me are in fact my anxiety disorder. He’s notoriously vague, but during a confrontation a while back, he got mad and gave a few details, which confirm my latter thought. He said, "I never said my life was like yours! I just see you doing things with people that I used to do but don’t do any more. You mischaracterize things, you play people off against each other!" In context, "mischaracterizing things" means cognitive distortions, which general anxiety sufferers like me have. "Playing people off against each other" isn’t so clear. I was discussing the old complaints against me and how he had handled them. I’m obsessive, so I get lost in details. Also, I was trying to refute accusations that he had never really made – "mischaracterizations," in fact cognitive distortions. For a while I thought this was an apparent rather than a real problem, since I had in fact responded to peoples’ complaints effectively – as we’ve discussed here! However, if I don’t get him and the other managers to see it, that’s a problem in itself! I’ll ask him for more details, if the chance arises. This may be something I need to work on with my counselor. If I didn’t think I had personal problems, I wouldn’t be on ASAPM. It’s just that I wasn’t interested in his solution – his religion. Dennis
Dennis, not wanting to adopt a person’s religion isn’t YOUR fault. You stated this early on in the job that they were pushing you to go to "their side". Don’t feel badly for that, please. You have your own opinions and you need to stick to them. kili — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm
Response:
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