WOMAN IN FORTIES FOUND OUT HAS ADD
Question:
"Maybe you’re just stupid. You ever think of that?"
Sorry about relating the same story twice. The first posting didn’t look like it got through. Me app’ies to all . . . I’m still here and still . . .
Response:
I’m so sorry to hear of your problems but don’t give up hope. I believe my daughter has this disorder but very slightly. She has some problems in school and with alot of hard work they finally tested her to find out she does have a lack of comprehension due to a low vocabulary intake. After years of struggling, they finally agreed to give her the help she needs, in resource center and other. I believe if you find the right physologist, u too will find the help you so deserve. Don’t give up for the sake of your sanity. Good luck.
Response:
I’m 46 and just found out a few months ago. I find that I am so relieved to know the great mystery is solved and that it has a name, and better yet, is treatable, that I am not ashamed or afraid in any way. I have not found a group yet, but what I long for is to be able to talk to people who understand what I’m saying about that odd little way my brain seems to work because theirs does too ! What I find rather exhausting is trying to explain or describe it to people who don’t have it ( like my mother, for instance ! ! ) and watch their faces looking back at me either blankly or in a rather befuddled within the confines of your skull "?? ) Think about it:. Perhaps it would be the most comforting and worthwhile activity you’ve found in a long time and you’ll be sorry you didn’t do it two years ago !! That’s the premise of a support group, anyway……. Good luck—mc
Response:
IN 1996 FOUND OUT I HAVE ADD. IT WAS A RELIEF TO KNOW THAT I WAS NOT GOING CRAZY. I AM ON MEDICINE AND IT HELPS SOME. JUST WISH I DIDN’T FEEL SO ALONE AT TIMES. MY FAMILY KNOWS BUT NOT MY WORK PLACE. HAVE NOT GONE TO SUPPORT GROUP, A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT GOING.
Well you’re sure welcome here. Lots of us adult ADD’er types here. 
Later, Pam
Response:
What I find rather exhausting is trying to explain or describe it to people who don’t have it ( like my mother, for instance ! ! ) and watch their faces looking back at me either blankly or in a rather befuddled within the confines of your skull "?? )
You know, it’s funny to me how much time can be spent expalining the quirks, only to have the listener say "Yeah, me too!". I’ve stopped trying to explain, it is too difficult and minimizing for me. On the other hand, my ADD friend lets me go on and on, we have the best talks. Mike
Response:
(" What do you mean when you say there is a feeding frenzy within the confines of your skull "?? ) You know, it’s funny to me how much time can be spent expalining the quirks, only to have the listener say "Yeah, me too!".
My first time searching out others and I run into two comments that set the mood, if not to a `T’ for me, then bloody close; these could have been my own utterances. I’ve never been diagnosed, so I guess I don’t `know’ whether or not I have ADD, but from everything I’ve read, heard, seen . . . well, you get the picture. My problem is that in the two times (over the past five years, and I’m 37 now) I’ve asked `quacks’ if there’s some kind of test I could take for ADD, they’ve all but laughed in my face. One, after asking me why I thought I might have this dysorder (and a doctor I had only seen for the first time) said: "Maybe you’re just stupid. You ever think of that?" I’m usually, as someone else in this thread mentioned, one to speak their mind, usually as it’s being thought. This time though, I managed to clamp my jaws shut so as not to be hauled off for a momentary lapse of humanity. I’m living in Canada and looking for some support. I keep running into things existing in the States, but haven’t come up with anything in Canada. Personally, I’m using the ‘net to find this information instead of more `personal’ means, because I think that if I hear this from one more self-serving medical arsehole I’m likley to bust a nose. Apologizing for the violent nature of some passages and thanking all who took the time to read my offal . . . I’m still here and still . . .
Response:
IN 1996 FOUND OUT I HAVE ADD. IT WAS A RELIEF TO KNOW THAT I WAS NOT GOING CRAZY. I AM ON MEDICINE AND IT HELPS SOME. JUST WISH I DIDN’T FEEL SO ALONE AT TIMES. MY FAMILY KNOWS BUT NOT MY WORK PLACE. HAVE NOT GONE TO SUPPORT GROUP, A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT GOING.
Response:
I worked for a fortune 50 computer firm (more like 60 now because I think they’re slipping fast) east of Sacramento. My supervisor decided I had cognitive difficulties. Something she didn’t like about the way I communicated verbally. I’m unable to think one thing and speak something else – I usually say what I’m thinking or as I’m thinking it (or repeat what I’ve rehearsed), yet I’m careful enough not to offend. Two weeks later I was DX’d as ADD and anxiety disorder (no wonder). I allowed my HMO to release the finding to my employer because my supervisor kept questioning me about it. She expected a get well date (as though I was a broken piece of equipment in need of some tweaking). Once I told them I was taking Ritalin my supervisor with the help of my personal liaison, more than doubled my work load. I offered to have a physical before they committed me to the new conditions. They would not even acknowledge my request to see my Dr. I soon developed stress injuries to the point I couldn’t walk for more than a year, as a result of the increased work. When I asked if they could accommodate me because of the newly acquired herniated disk I got from the ordeal, they said I would have to find my own accommodations. So I asked for some help — they said there wasn’t the resources for that. So I had to do the work of two or three? I never asked for any accommodation for the ADD because I never needed any for the prior 16 years I worked there. They saw fit to give me accommodations for ADD whether I wanted them or not. In a move to allow me more time to do non direct labor types of work, (paper work and such which I wasn’t accustomed to in the first place) they cut the time allotted for the physical part of the job by more than one half. And then gave me more physical work when I wasn’t doing paper projects. Simply put, their ADD discovery which had nothing to do with my average performance level, eventually got me seriously injured. DON’T TELL YOUR EMPLOYER ANY THING YOU DON’T HAVE TOO! And if they harass you, quit and seek help from the EEOC immediately. Another thing don’t tell any new employer you have problems. They don’t have a legal right to ask. If they don’t like the way you are they’re going to fire you anyway. BTW thanks to worker’s compensation, employers have the right to kill you if you’re stupid enough, as I was, not to quit. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – IN 1996 FOUND OUT I HAVE ADD. IT WAS A RELIEF TO KNOW THAT I WAS NOT GOING CRAZY. I AM ON MEDICINE AND IT HELPS SOME. JUST WISH I DIDN’T FEEL SO ALONE AT TIMES. MY FAMILY KNOWS BUT NOT MY WORK PLACE. HAVE NOT GONE TO SUPPORT GROUP, A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT GOING.
Response:
Marny here. Going to any new place can be a bit much… but I’ll bet you’ll do it and then enjoy all the stuff you learn and the people that you’ll meet. All CAPS, btw, usually designates shouting or yelling, which I don’t think you are doing. The caps are also much more difficult to read. Gentle as you go, Marny
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -IN 1996 FOUND OUT I HAVE ADD. IT WAS A RELIEF TO KNOW THAT I WAS NOT GOING CRAZY. I AM ON MEDICINE AND IT HELPS SOME. JUST WISH I DIDN’T FEEL SO ALONE AT TIMES. MY FAMILY KNOWS BUT NOT MY WORK PLACE. HAVE NOT GONE TO SUPPORT GROUP, A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT GOING.
