"Magical Thinking"
Question:
On Sat, 16 Feb 2002 22:53:01 GMT, "AionaRap" – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -<aionar…@hatespamhotmail.com> wrote: >Sorry for the jarbled message, I am angry about all this. >Has anyone wished they could click thier ruby slippers three >times and repeat to themselves: >"I want to go back in time when I didn’t know it was ME" >"I want to go back in time when I didn’t know it was ME" >"I want to go back in time when I didn’t know it was ME" >I have gotten to the point where I hate my brain. My brain is the >enemy, not me. I feel like something has taken over my brain like >in the movie "The invasion of the body snatchers". I hate it. >Life was much more comfortable when I thought it was THEM after >me. That, I can deal with. Mental illness? That, I CAN NOT deal >with. I always felt I was very normal. >- AionaRap
Hey, I feel the same way, I wanna go back to when I was a well adjusted young man, sz hit me when I was 27, lasted for about 5 months, then hit me bigger when I was 28 and have been ‘ill’ since. I am now 30 and don’t hold down a job because of it. Kevin
Response:
Hey Kevin, I’m in the same boat as you but it hit me when I was 24 in 1997, now 29. My psychosis at the longest lasted about a couple months. (First time it happen to me) then about a year of flat emotion on the medication and stuff really sucked. Then a half a good year in 99. Then whole crappy year in 00′ Then a great year in 2001 nearly to November with no problems. Now down again had a little epsisode. I too haven’t been able to hold a job because of the illness. If I try I get to stressed out and have an episode. Sucks. I pray you have good family around you. Keep in touch. Rob
Response:
On Sun, 17 Feb 2002 02:07:55 -0600, "Mystery51" – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -<r…@nationalkarting.com> wrote: >Hey Kevin, >I’m in the same boat as you but it hit me when I was 24 in 1997, now 29. My >psychosis at the longest lasted about a couple months. (First time it happen >to me) then about a year of flat emotion on the medication and stuff really >sucked. Then a half a good year in 99. Then whole crappy year in 00′ Then a >great year in 2001 nearly to November with no problems. Now down again had a >little epsisode. I too haven’t been able to hold a job because of the >illness. If I try I get to stressed out and have an episode. Sucks. I pray >you have good family around you. >Keep in touch. >Rob
Hi Rob, Thanks for the kind words! I started reading this newsgroup after my first episode, stopped for a while, now have come back to it again. I was in denial that I was sz, but it now seems that I have had to accept that I am not normal anymore! I do have a very good family around me, who are understanding and supportive. Kevin
Response:
Same here. I got away from the NG too. As things get better I tend to go away from the NG. When things get bad I always seem to come back. Bad for me is just the depression caused by apathy that follows the episodes. The episodes themselves aren’t more than a few weeks longs tops. I think the episodes fry some wiring in my brain and then it takes a good 6 months for it’s self to figure out how to rewire itself back to my old self. That Geodon sounds like an interesting choice of meds. I’m on Risperdal right now and working my way off it again. What’s depressing is to think of life somewhat dependent on others. Not so much now in my late twenties, but what scares me is what about when the family around me, Mom & Dad get older and need someone to care for them who will it be. I’ve got one brother who is 14 now and hopefully he will be around for long time. It’s depressing to think I’m going to live another 50-70yrs with this illness. Times aren’t always bad for me and there are good things too fortunately. I can’t imagine how tough it is for those with Sz and don’t have family support. Definitely have to give some big props out to them for doing a great job. Even if they don’t think they are. Rob "K L Chambers" <spar…@ntlworld.com> wrote in message news:qacv6ukjqjgdoo3cuuablcdhg9cg9fijj9@4ax.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> On Sun, 17 Feb 2002 02:07:55 -0600, "Mystery51" > <r…@nationalkarting.com> wrote: > >Hey Kevin, > >I’m in the same boat as you but it hit me when I was 24 in 1997, now 29. My > >psychosis at the longest lasted about a couple months. (First time it happen > >to me) then about a year of flat emotion on the medication and stuff really > >sucked. Then a half a good year in 99. Then whole crappy year in 00′ Then a > >great year in 2001 nearly to November with no problems. Now down again had a > >little epsisode. I too haven’t been able to hold a job because of the > >illness. If I try I get to stressed out and have an episode. Sucks. I pray > >you have good family around you. > >Keep in touch. > >Rob > Hi Rob, > Thanks for the kind words! > I started reading this newsgroup after my first episode, stopped for a > while, now have come back to it again. I was in denial that I was sz, > but it now seems that I have had to accept that I am not normal > anymore! > I do have a very good family around me, who are understanding and > supportive. > Kevin
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Response:
"walt" wrote in message:
But if I believe that the Earth never does revolve, that might be classified as delusional (because so many believe it is false), but not magical, because it does not involve my power, or another’s power. Walt Walt, I agree with everyone. But I also think that there are different levels of "magical thinking" as there are different levels of intensity of symptoms that people experience with sz. What I went through was a piece of cake as compared to some of the experiences I have read as posted in this newsgroup. For me it was HELL, for someone who has intense sz symptoms, it would be a walk in the park. As far as magical thinking, I do think I have that, but on a much smaller scale than someone who believes that the world has stopped revolving because they didn’t lock the door properly. It’s all a matter of your point of reference I suppose. What is real to me would be classified as magical thinking to my doctor, I am sure of that. I have not been honest with my doctor. While I was psychotic, I was positive that if I said too much he would be overwhelmed and overburdened and it would hurt him psysically. I was POSITIVE of this, without a doubt. So, I didn’t tell him hardly anything. I kept my feelings and my symptoms to myself. If he asked me questions I would respond with "I don’t know". Of course he knew I was psychotic, but I wasn’t saying how or why or where or what. I am over the psychosis now, so I am opening up and although the feelings I had then seem unreal to me now even though I remember them very vividly, they were very real TO ME at that time. I often wonder though, if the doctor went to a restaurant and had a guy sitting across the room trying to make a mental connection with his brain, would he think that it was normal because he was experiencing that and it was reality to him, or that he was having sz symptoms? It was real to me! Just because the doctor doesn’t experience the same thing does not make it unreal at all. I don’t think I am sick, I just think that the docs and the people who are NOT affected with these things don’t understand. They would if they had them though, wouldn’t they? Sorry for the jarbled message, I am angry about all this. Has anyone wished they could click thier ruby slippers three times and repeat to themselves: "I want to go back in time when I didn’t know it was ME" "I want to go back in time when I didn’t know it was ME" "I want to go back in time when I didn’t know it was ME" I have gotten to the point where I hate my brain. My brain is the enemy, not me. I feel like something has taken over my brain like in the movie "The invasion of the body snatchers". I hate it. Life was much more comfortable when I thought it was THEM after me. That, I can deal with. Mental illness? That, I CAN NOT deal with. I always felt I was very normal. – AionaRap
Response:
> Thanks for your response, and I am curious if you believe the same > thing? Or know someone who does? – AionaRap
Well, believe in some things. I believe in what Jesus said. I have seen that Christianity is very good for me, and many things in Christianity are good for other peoples too. But, I am open to many others beliefs concepts that I feel good about. I dont like too much about religious extremist, but I can understand them too. And about harmony. Would world be more in harmony, if people could be more understanding and caring about other creatures. I feel that I have some understanding about how some things should be, then again so we all have, or atleast I wish so. Ofcourse there is nothing that should be somehow, but some things are far better than others.
Response:
"Vaipen" <nospam.ver…@maildump.nl> wrote in message
news:3c7535dc.27792994@news… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> On 24 Jan 2002 05:06:33 -0800, AionaR…@hotmail.com (AionaRap) eloquently > sang the following hymns: > >My doc kept asking if I have magical thinking. I have not understood > >this question and said a firm no, until I thought about it for a > >while. I then did some research on the words "magical thinking" in the > >psychology texts, and now I understand what he is asking about. He > >wants to know if I have beliefs that are not shared by most people. > >And, I am posting to see if any of you share the same beliefs. > I have what is called magical thinking. Examples in gneral are: > superstition, beleif in clairvoyance, telepathy or a sixt sense. > >To make it short, I believe that the earth and everything in it is > >just energy passed from one thing to another, > I don’t call that magical thinking in the psychological way of p-docs. I > call that a belief or an intelectual excersize in the line of explaining > reality.
I agree with Vaipen. That belief is too broad to be called "magical". I think a belief, to be classified as "magical", must be a belief specifically in some capability that I have, or that someone else has, that most people in my culture regard as impossible. To invent an example, if I believe I can make the Earth stop revolving by an act of my will, that is an action that most people in my culture believe is impossible for me, so my shrink would classify my belief in it as "magical". A magical power I have. But if I believe that the Earth never does revolve, that might be classified as delusional (because so many believe it is false), but not magical, because it does not involve my power, or another’s power. Walt
Response:
I think alonalrap is indeed being poetic. It is man’s poetic nature and his association with things of sentiment which do much to make our view of this world unique to our species. Are you saying sentiment and poetic notation are not reflections of truth? Then….there in no such thing as "A Country". There is no such thing as a song. No such thing as romantic love. And of course…..if these tools of vision are removed then there is no God theory/concept to speak of at all becuse we would never suspect there was one. And your family is merely a survival game/tool. I’ve gone too far….but you understand the gist of my perspectve? Because the birds do not talk to you and explain the mystery of the world you can’t claim there is not a greater mystery. Maybe the bird was having a bad day that day or something and didn’t feel like talking? Who said…"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, then are thought of in your philosophy."? All religions are bouqueted in a pamorama of poetry and sentimental perspectives. Damo
Response:
Hi Aapa, Yeah that happens. You pick up one god theory/concept that kinda fits and you find it impossible to put a lmitation on it. Totally unexpeted outcome in my case. Its still possible to follow the reasoning it to absurd conclusions though. EVERYTHING is under God’s control. Thats not true. At one point….like the arabs say… "You gotta trust in God but tie your camel". Predestination versus freewill always lurks on the threshold. Damo http://www.netword.com/Damodara’s.Passage http://community.webtv.net/damodara/MyStoryasIseeit
Response:
damod…@webtv.net wrote in message <news:2844-3C548E00-288@storefull-616.iap.bryant.webtv.net>… > Who said…"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, then are > thought of in your philosophy."? > All religions are bouqueted in a pamorama of poetry and sentimental > perspectives. > Damo
Well as long as it is not magical thinking like my doctor keeps asking about, I will tell him about my faith if he asks. He really should use more precise wording when he asks a question though, and not keywords found in some psychology textbook. I do see life through rose colored glasses (always the optimist) so I guess my faith is mine alone because it suits me. I don’t think anyone else’s religion has any further factual content than mine does. So what if people don’t believe it, I believe it to be true, and thats all that matters. As long as my faith is not something that the doc says is "wrong" or "unhealthy" for my brain (thus producing the psychosis), then I am ok with that. If he tries to say it is wrong though I might lose faith in him, because I can’t lose faith in what I believe to be true. Thanks for all your input – AionaRap
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -AionaR…@hotmail.com (AionaRap) wrote in message <news:b09ac141.0201240506.7a30a483@posting.google.com>… > My doc kept asking if I have magical thinking. I have not understood > this question and said a firm no, until I thought about it for a > while. I then did some research on the words "magical thinking" in the > psychology texts, and now I understand what he is asking about. He > wants to know if I have beliefs that are not shared by most people. > And, I am posting to see if any of you share the same beliefs. > [...] > To make it short, I believe that the earth and everything in it is > just energy passed from one thing to another, in a constant motion, > that drives life and keeps things in sync. For instance, the energy > that passes through the ground makes it way up through trees and to > birds who then bring it down to plants and it cycles over and over > and constantly, everywhere. The energy, to me, is God. So in essence, > we are all God, because we are all energy. [...] > Is this the magical thinking that the doc is asking about? It might do > him well to not use such vague keywords to ask a question. To me it is > not magical thinking, it is reality and very important. – AionaRap
This a very poetic vision. An artist might like this view, but it certainly does stray from what is generally thought of as reality. Energy and objects have equivalence only inside nuclear reactors. If birds and trees communicate it is only through their interdependence and coexistence. I doubt that your viewpoint constitutes "magical thinking" unless there is more to the story than you are telling. Why do you believe this "energy" viewpoint of yours is real? Do the birds on the birdfeeder ever turn to you and say anything?
Response:
Once upon a winter’s day, sw…@mondenet.com put fingertips to keyboard and tap-tap-tapped out the following communication… > magic, thats just some people talking about things they dont understand, hey > take your meds before someone casts a spell on you and you turn into a > frog.
Too late in your case, dude. :o) — ‘Madness is the channel by which we receive the greatest blessings’ – Socrates Please reply to the newsgroups only
Response:
"AionaRap" <AionaR…@hotmail.com> kirjoitti viestiss
