Obsessive-Compulsive Disorders » OCD Help

Long… Problems with Doctors office…

admin — Mon, 31 Oct 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Another possibility would be to just tell him when you see him, I seem to remember you had an appointment coming up? Philip

This makes the most sense to me. After all, if you write him a letter who do you think will open it first? I might, however, just ignore the nurses and buy a blood pressure monitor. It’s hard to find a good doctor you can trust. Yes, you were treated poorly, but you also don’t know how he feels about those nurses. As long as you and your doctor have a good relationship that’s all that matters. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Another possibility would be to just tell him when you see him, I seem to remember you had an appointment coming up? Philip This makes the most sense to me. After all, if you write him a letter who do you think will open it first? I might, however, just ignore the nurses and buy a blood pressure monitor. It’s hard to find a good doctor you can trust. Yes, you were treated poorly, but you also don’t know how he feels about those nurses. As long as you and your doctor have a good relationship that’s all that matters.

I agree we are often treated unfairly-it happens. There is no guarantee that everyone will like you or treat you with dignity-so what. If your relationship with your doctor is helpful but his nurses treat you unfairly-deal with them as you would anyone else that treats you poorly-ignore them. They are not there to be your friends, they serve you as a gateway to making appointments and taking your money. That’s it. It would be preferable to have a nice relationship with them, but is not imperative to your relationship with your doctor-buy an omron blood pressure machine for 50 bucks and take your own — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

I agree with the people who say tell the doctor about the nurses’ behavior. They were unprofessional and just plain rude. Deirdre — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

I am still upset about it today. And I really think that I am goin to write the docotor a letter. I just have to figure out exactly what to say, and what to ask of my doctor… jamie — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Just take your time and write yourself a draft first. Then think about it and then recopy it. I hope your doctor has empathy for you. Di

I am still upset about it today. And I really think that I am goin to write the docotor a letter. I just have to figure out exactly what to say, and what to ask of my doctor… jamie

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

I think I will work on this tonight or tommrow once I am a little more calmed down. thanks, jamie — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Good idea, Jamie. I can’t think straight when I’m upset about anything. Di

I think I will work on this tonight or tommrow once I am a little more calmed down. thanks, jamie

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Just take your time and write yourself a draft first. Then think about it and then recopy it. I hope your doctor has empathy for you.

Another possibility would be to just tell him when you see him, I seem to remember you had an appointment coming up? Philip I am still upset about it today. And I really think that I am goin to write the docotor a letter. I just have to figure out exactly what to say, and what to ask of my doctor… jamie

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Jamie, you are NOT a burden to anyone! Please don’t feel that way. I can’t help anyone here most of the time so I know how you feel. Everyone is here for just about the same reason. Yes, I think you should write to your doctor about the nurses. This is only my opinion, but if it were me I would write. I think the nurses have some nerve talking about you like that! It pisses me off. {{{{{Jamie}}}}} Di

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Everyone; Last week on Sunday like 8-9 days ago I started propranal, my doctor told me every 2 to 3 days to come in and have my blood presure checked, I asked him where to go to have my blood presure checked, he said, "Just come in here and say HI and waive and one of use can check it for you" I was in for an apointment last week, and had it checked no problem. I though today that I should have it checked again, so I went in, just steped into the hall way there where they would be able to see me, like the doctor told me to, as I understood it, and I hear the nurses in the back groud "Look who is in the hall way" Look who is in the hall way" "Jamie is standing out there in the hall way" "You go talk to him" "No, You should go say something ..{couldent quite make this out}" One of them walked past me and glared at me without saying anything, and the rest of them just ingored me, they had to have known I was there, they were talking about me, by name. Then the doctor come out of the room he is in, and says hi, and takes my blood presure, no problem. The thing I don’t understand this; Isnt it unprofessional for these nurses to be talking about me right where they know I can hear them, Isnt it unprofessional for them to me talking about me outloud at all? These are the same nurses that I bring pens, candy, doughnuts, etc to. Why are they treating me like this???? I like my doctor a lot, he has been great to me, but do I really deserve to put up with the treatment from these nurses? Should I flat out write a letter to this doctor and tell him how unprofessional these nurses are being??? would that be approiate? Would it solve anything? Please let me know what to do!!! This is the doctor that I have been relaying on going to for years now that has helped me though tons of problems, and I dont want to stop going to him because his nurses are mean to me, but I dont see why I should have to put up with this abuse from these nurses. Please Help, Please Comment, Jamie If you recall earlier this year, I had a problem with different nurses at this office earlier this year, see following text I wrote in Jan: sorry to post this here, but i am really frustrated…. More problems with People — Serious Problems WAS: Re: Small Small Sample of the people that I think I am angry with… All 8 messages in topic – view as tree jamie dolan (AKA OCD Boy) Jan 8, 12:42 am show options Newsgroups: alt.support.ocd messages by this author problems with People — Serious Problems WAS: Re: Small Small Sample of the people that I think I am angry with… Reply to Author | Forward | Print | Individual Message | Show original | Report Abuse HI; Thanks for the good ideas. Here in an example of something that happened today. OK here is my latest problem:::: Maybe we can break this down, and figure out what is causing these feelings: Ok here is my day today: Get up at 7:45 and go to chiro and PT, exercise till about 10:30 All is well. Go to grocery get an sandwitch and salad, go home, and eat it. Karen come by with dogs, and eats lunch. I decide that I wanted to keep working on getting my christmas presents done. I decided that I wanted to make a print of a photograph for my primary doctor. I went got out my photos, went though them, etc etc, then found several I liked, and brough it to walmart, I could not decide what one i liked best, so I had walmart make like 5 print for me to decide from. Then I looked at walmart, but I could not find a 11×14 frame that I though was sutiable. So I went to kohls and looked and looked, and I finally found the perfect frame. Then i went back to walmart to pick up my prints, ad I got the finest pencil i could find. I bought by prints, and the pencils, and I bought a copy of myst the comptuer game for $20. ( I should not have spent the money, I dont have the money to spend) Then I signed the phoho j. dolan 2005 on the matt, and put the frame together with the photo i picked out, which took me a while to decide on. Then I knew my doctor was working in the immediate care unit at the clinic because it was friday afternoon and he always works there on friday afternoons. So I went over there… it was slow there any he didnt seem to mind talking to me without an apointment at all. However, I the nurse seemed anoyed…. and gave him the photo, with a bow on it that i picked out. I was kind of nervious bringint it to him, not knowing if he would like it, but I did it, and he really seemed to like it. then i get home, and all is cool… but i see my neighbors kids walking home from school, and he normally picks them up, so i ask them what is up… well they tell me that there dad, my neighbor is at the dentist again because of all the pain he is in. so i get the kids in there house, and i call there dad, he is at the dentist, and they are not able to work on him, and the strongest pain killer they will give him is Tyonel with codiene. They told him they could do nothing more. He told me that he had taken tyolyonel with codine before and it did not work. He was clearly in a lot of pain. So at 4:00 p.m. at my neighbors request, (george), I took him in to the clinic to see a doctor — which happened to be my doctor. He checked in, and went back shortly and i waited in the waiting room. This nurse the saw him, saw that I was there with him. She apherently though that he was drug seeking or something because she told him not to even waste his time seeing the doctor, and bitched him out, and told him that he should leave. So he left, and he was still in excruciating pain. So in like 45 minutes after we tried to pick up his prescruptption for tyonol with codine, but the pharmacy was so slow that we left and i went back to the clinic. and I went in and talked to the reciptionist and asked to talk to my doctor, but he was really busy, then this nurse came back out and I asked her what he should do. She tells me that I should not do anything, and that he should just take the pain kilers from the dentist and that he would be fine, I told her that he knew they would not work because he had them before and he wanted to see the doctor. well she just reamed me out telling me how i didnt know anything and that i should not be trying to help him at all, even though he was in severe pain. I asked her if he should go to the er and she told me no that I should not do anything. then she tells me to leave. to leave the building, so I ask her for her name. She refuses to give me her name. I ask the reciptionist for this ladys name, and she refuses to give me the ladys name either. and this nurse just keep hollering at me to leave., then the reciptionsit goes and hides in back as well… they are all avoiding me at this point… and i was completly polite and calm this whole entire time. now at this point, they are all hiding in there back area and there is no staff around, so i go upstairs and look for my normal nurse that i know to ask her for help. i could not find her, so i come back down stairs, and apherently by this time, my doctor got invloved, and figured out that something was going on and that i was not a happy camper….. So at this point the nurse comes to me, and says: "the doctor is going to talk to you about this, but this is the last time", and I am like what do you mean? I didnt understand what she was saying then she is like: "from now on you are going to be treated like any other paient and you can not see the doctor wtihout an apointment" (ok hello, this was all starting with a regular legitimite signin to the immidate care) so anyway the nurse keeps bitching about how i cant have this special treatment blah blah…. and finally she brings me back to an office and says the doctor is going to come in soon to talk to me. So I explain to him what happened. well it turns out that this nurse told him that I told george that he would give him narcotic pain killrs, which was completly un true. i told george that my doctor would see him and talk to him and my doctor would judge what the best course of action was. i told him that I did not say anything about him getting any pain killers from them at all. I told him that the only thing that I even mentioned to george was that maybe he could ask the doctor for a tordol shot for the pain and that was it…. so at this point, I am talking to my doctor, and i am just balling my fucking eyes outs.. and i get done explaining to him what is going on, and he tells me that basically that this is just a big mis understanding with this nurse, and that he understands that I had really good intentions and that this nurse just didnt

Response:

Hi Everyone; Last week on Sunday like 8-9 days ago I started propranal, my doctor told me every 2 to 3 days to come in and have my blood presure checked, I asked him where to go to have my blood presure checked, he said, "Just come in here and say HI and waive and one of use can check it for you" I was in for an apointment last week, and had it checked no problem. I though today that I should have it checked again, so I went in, just steped into the hall way there where they would be able to see me, like the doctor told me to, as I understood it, and I hear the nurses in the back groud "Look who is in the hall way" Look who is in the hall way" "Jamie is standing out there in the hall way" "You go talk to him" "No, You should go say something ..{couldent quite make this out}" One of them walked past me and glared at me without saying anything, and the rest of them just ingored me, they had to have known I was there, they were talking about me, by name. Then the doctor come out of the room he is in, and says hi, and takes my blood presure, no problem. The thing I don’t understand this; Isnt it unprofessional for these nurses to be talking about me right where they know I can hear them, Isnt it unprofessional for them to me talking about me outloud at all? These are the same nurses that I bring pens, candy, doughnuts, etc to. Why are they treating me like this???? I like my doctor a lot, he has been great to me, but do I really deserve to put up with the treatment from these nurses? Should I flat out write a letter to this doctor and tell him how unprofessional these nurses are being??? would that be approiate? Would it solve anything? Please let me know what to do!!! This is the doctor that I have been relaying on going to for years now that has helped me though tons of problems, and I dont want to stop going to him because his nurses are mean to me, but I dont see why I should have to put up with this abuse from these nurses. Please Help, Please Comment, Jamie If you recall earlier this year, I had a problem with different nurses at this office earlier this year, see following text I wrote in Jan: sorry to post this here, but i am really frustrated…. More problems with People — Serious Problems WAS: Re: Small Small Sample of the people that I think I am angry with… All 8 messages in topic – view as tree jamie dolan (AKA OCD Boy) Jan 8, 12:42 am show options Newsgroups: alt.support.ocd messages by this author problems with People — Serious Problems WAS: Re: Small Small Sample of the people that I think I am angry with… Reply to Author | Forward | Print | Individual Message | Show original | Report Abuse HI; Thanks for the good ideas. Here in an example of something that happened today. OK here is my latest problem:::: Maybe we can break this down, and figure out what is causing these feelings: Ok here is my day today: Get up at 7:45 and go to chiro and PT, exercise till about 10:30 All is well. Go to grocery get an sandwitch and salad, go home, and eat it. Karen come by with dogs, and eats lunch. I decide that I wanted to keep working on getting my christmas presents done. I decided that I wanted to make a print of a photograph for my primary doctor. I went got out my photos, went though them, etc etc, then found several I liked, and brough it to walmart, I could not decide what one i liked best, so I had walmart make like 5 print for me to decide from. Then I looked at walmart, but I could not find a 11×14 frame that I though was sutiable. So I went to kohls and looked and looked, and I finally found the perfect frame. Then i went back to walmart to pick up my prints, ad I got the finest pencil i could find. I bought by prints, and the pencils, and I bought a copy of myst the comptuer game for $20. ( I should not have spent the money, I dont have the money to spend) Then I signed the phoho j. dolan 2005 on the matt, and put the frame together with the photo i picked out, which took me a while to decide on. Then I knew my doctor was working in the immediate care unit at the clinic because it was friday afternoon and he always works there on friday afternoons. So I went over there… it was slow there any he didnt seem to mind talking to me without an apointment at all. However, I the nurse seemed anoyed…. and gave him the photo, with a bow on it that i picked out. I was kind of nervious bringint it to him, not knowing if he would like it, but I did it, and he really seemed to like it. then i get home, and all is cool… but i see my neighbors kids walking home from school, and he normally picks them up, so i ask them what is up… well they tell me that there dad, my neighbor is at the dentist again because of all the pain he is in. so i get the kids in there house, and i call there dad, he is at the dentist, and they are not able to work on him, and the strongest pain killer they will give him is Tyonel with codiene. They told him they could do nothing more. He told me that he had taken tyolyonel with codine before and it did not work. He was clearly in a lot of pain. So at 4:00 p.m. at my neighbors request, (george), I took him in to the clinic to see a doctor — which happened to be my doctor. He checked in, and went back shortly and i waited in the waiting room. This nurse the saw him, saw that I was there with him. She apherently though that he was drug seeking or something because she told him not to even waste his time seeing the doctor, and bitched him out, and told him that he should leave. So he left, and he was still in excruciating pain. So in like 45 minutes after we tried to pick up his prescruptption for tyonol with codine, but the pharmacy was so slow that we left and i went back to the clinic. and I went in and talked to the reciptionist and asked to talk to my doctor, but he was really busy, then this nurse came back out and I asked her what he should do. She tells me that I should not do anything, and that he should just take the pain kilers from the dentist and that he would be fine, I told her that he knew they would not work because he had them before and he wanted to see the doctor. well she just reamed me out telling me how i didnt know anything and that i should not be trying to help him at all, even though he was in severe pain. I asked her if he should go to the er and she told me no that I should not do anything. then she tells me to leave. to leave the building, so I ask her for her name. She refuses to give me her name. I ask the reciptionist for this ladys name, and she refuses to give me the ladys name either. and this nurse just keep hollering at me to leave., then the reciptionsit goes and hides in back as well… they are all avoiding me at this point… and i was completly polite and calm this whole entire time. now at this point, they are all hiding in there back area and there is no staff around, so i go upstairs and look for my normal nurse that i know to ask her for help. i could not find her, so i come back down stairs, and apherently by this time, my doctor got invloved, and figured out that something was going on and that i was not a happy camper….. So at this point the nurse comes to me, and says: "the doctor is going to talk to you about this, but this is the last time", and I am like what do you mean? I didnt understand what she was saying then she is like: "from now on you are going to be treated like any other paient and you can not see the doctor wtihout an apointment" (ok hello, this was all starting with a regular legitimite signin to the immidate care) so anyway the nurse keeps bitching about how i cant have this special treatment blah blah…. and finally she brings me back to an office and says the doctor is going to come in soon to talk to me. So I explain to him what happened. well it turns out that this nurse told him that I told george that he would give him narcotic pain killrs, which was completly un true. i told george that my doctor would see him and talk to him and my doctor would judge what the best course of action was. i told him that I did not say anything about him getting any pain killers from them at all. I told him that the only thing that I even mentioned to george was that maybe he could ask the doctor for a tordol shot for the pain and that was it…. so at this point, I am talking to my doctor, and i am just balling my fucking eyes outs.. and i get done explaining to him what is going on, and he tells me that basically that this is just a big mis understanding with this nurse, and that he understands that I had really good intentions and that this nurse just didnt understand what was going on. He ened up telling me that if my neighbor goerge is in that much pain — bascially once he understnad what was going on — that i need to take him to the er. then he just told me that i should just leave, and I should just see him in his office upstairs and stay away from the immediate care clinic where this nurse is. I was just crying the whole time, and my doctor told me that it ok, and he understands that I was only trying to help, and he wanted to just keep seeing me in his ofice upstairs. and by the end of the converation, I was still crying… and my doctor was giving me a hug… So I am cool with my doctor, but I dont know what I did to this nurse to make her so made, and to have her refuse care to george. I had brought this same nurse dougnuts just a couple weeks ago…. I cried for over an hour after this was all over.. and I am still very depressed now. I then ended up like 3 hours later took george to the er, and they gave him stronger … read more »

Response:

Problem with Nurse

admin — Mon, 31 Oct 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Response:

Hi Everyone;

Hey Jamie! HI It’s more than unprofessional IMO… that is what i though.. thanks for agreeing… These are the same nurses that I bring pens, candy, doughnuts, etc to. Why are they treating me like this????

You have multiple issues which can complicate your interactions with others, it would well be that those nurses think of you as "strange" but that’s their failure not yours: it’s *their* lack of knowledge and understanding leading them to behave this way. Could it be they see your acts of kindness as being flirtatious? I dont think so…. but i dont read people well. When I bring in stuff I bring it for like everyone,,, like a couple dozen people there.. like 5 or 6 dozen doughtnuts,,,, so no one is being singled out by any means in any way…. I like my doctor a lot, he has been great to me, but do I really deserve to put up with the treatment from these nurses? Should I flat out write a letter to this doctor and tell him how unprofessional these nurses are being??? would that be approiate? Would it solve anything?

I think just telling your doc would be a good first step instead of putting it in writing, he could then talk to them and maybe solve the problem without making the situation worse. Let him know how it made you feel… My doc is pretty busy, so it is hard to sit down with him and explain this clearly… but I could write a breif private note to him explaining what is going on…… Please let me know what to do!!! This is the doctor that I have been relaying on going to for years now that has helped me though tons of problems, and I dont want to stop going to him because his nurses are mean to me, but I dont see why I should have to put up with this abuse from these nurses.

{{{Jamie}}} I truly hope your doc can sort this out for you, good luck! Thank YOu Jamie Vashti

Response:

I guess the biggest thing is that this sort of thing has happened multiple times now in this same office / clinic… and when I started bringing in dougunuts in the first place was after they were mean to me, I though I would use some reverse pschylogoly and get them on myside by being kind after they were mean to me for no reason…. I have been repeteadly been mistreated by the nurses at this office,,, up to the point where I had one of them yell at me in front of other paients and tell me to leave because she didnt think I should see the doctor. She though I can in too often. It is very very very uncomfortable going there… jamie

Response:

Is this in the US? Most offices don’t try to drive away patients. Do they get paid for seeing you? Perhaps the nurses don’t understand OCD or some aspect of your situation. Why do you think they are treating you badly? _g

Response:

!Nasty nurse!

Response:

Hi Everyone;

Hey Jamie! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last week on Sunday like 8-9 days ago I started propranal, my doctor told me every 2 to 3 days to come in and have my blood presure checked, I asked him where to go to have my blood presure checked, he said,"Just come in here and say HI and waive and one of use can check it for you" I was in for an apointment last week, and had it checked no problem. I though today that I should have it checked again, so I went in, just steped into the hall way there where they would be able to see me, like the doctor told me to, as I understood it, and I hear the nurses in the back groud "Look who is in the hall way" Look who is in the hall way" "Jamie is standing out there in the hall way" "You go talk to him" "No, You should go say something ..{couldent quite make this out}" One of them walked past me and glared at me without saying anything, and the rest of them just ingored me, they had to have known I was there, they were talking about me, by name. Then the doctor come out of the room he is in, and says hi, and takes my blood presure, no problem. The thing I don’t understand this; Isnt it unprofessional for these nurses to be talking about me right where they know I can hear them, Isnt it unprofessional for them to me talking about me outloud at all?

It’s more than unprofessional IMO… These are the same nurses that I bring pens, candy, doughnuts, etc to. Why are they treating me like this????

You have multiple issues which can complicate your interactions with others, it would well be that those nurses think of you as "strange" but that’s their failure not yours: it’s *their* lack of knowledge and understanding leading them to behave this way. Could it be they see your acts of kindness as being flirtatious? I like my doctor a lot, he has been great to me, but do I really deserve to put up with the treatment from these nurses? Should I flat out write a letter to this doctor and tell him how unprofessional these nurses are being??? would that be approiate? Would it solve anything?

I think just telling your doc would be a good first step instead of putting it in writing, he could then talk to them and maybe solve the problem without making the situation worse. Let him know how it made you feel… Please let me know what to do!!! This is the doctor that I have been relaying on going to for years now that has helped me though tons of problems, and I dont want to stop going to him because his nurses are mean to me, but I dont see why I should have to put up with this abuse from these nurses.

{{{Jamie}}} I truly hope your doc can sort this out for you, good luck! Vashti

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Hi Everyone; Last week on Sunday like 8-9 days ago I started propranal, my doctor told me every 2 to 3 days to come in and have my blood presure checked, I asked him where to go to have my blood presure checked, he said, "Just come in here and say HI and waive and one of use can check it for you" I was in for an apointment last week, and had it checked no problem. I though today that I should have it checked again, so I went in, just steped into the hall way there where they would be able to see me, like the doctor told me to, as I understood it, and I hear the nurses in the back groud "Look who is in the hall way" Look who is in the hall way" "Jamie is standing out there in the hall way" "You go talk to him" "No, You should go say something ..{couldent quite make this out}" One of them walked past me and glared at me without saying anything, and the rest of them just ingored me, they had to have known I was there, they were talking about me, by name. Then the doctor come out of the room he is in, and says hi, and takes my blood presure, no problem. The thing I don’t understand this; Isnt it unprofessional for these nurses to be talking about me right where they know I can hear them, Isnt it unprofessional for them to me talking about me outloud at all?

Perhaps. These are the same nurses that I bring pens, candy, doughnuts, etc to. Why are they treating me like this????

Perhaps something happened when you brought them candy and doughnuts that blurred the line between the personal and the professional. I like my doctor a lot, he has been great to me, but do I really deserve to put up with the treatment from these nurses? Should I flat out write a letter to this doctor and tell him how unprofessional these nurses are being??? would that be approiate? Would it solve anything?

No. You couldn’t quite make out what they were saying so you should give them a little slack. Please let me know what to do!!! This is the doctor that I have been relaying on going to for years now that has helped me though tons of problems, and I dont want to stop going to him because his nurses are mean to me, but I dont see why I should have to put up with this abuse from these nurses.

I don’t follow that you were abused. Maybe you were but it seems to me that there is more to the story. Perhaps it is all a misunderstanding. _g

Response:

Caring Too Much About What Other People Think

admin — Sun, 23 Oct 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

>Without it, I see something like Parker’s step 1 as a hopeless exercise of

trying to convince oneself by rote of a position which can’t be >supported rationally.

Exactly, a lot of these people who truly behave as though others don’t matter end up raping and killing them and we have a justice system which puts you in prison if you do that and in prison you have to answer to other people’s egos too…

Response:

> > You think so? I can’t shake the feeling that actual apathy about what other people think would be tantamount to driving down a freeway with a blindfold on… Not giving a damn about what other people think doesn’t necessarily prepare you for when you crash into the reality that what other people think does at times have practical implications for your life. krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > Yeah maybe I don’t want the other extreme, somewhere in the middle would be nice.

"Approaching Nearmal" > Although in certain situations, not giving a damn would be useful, so I could stop worrying about trivial things like what the neighbors must think of me because I never talk to them and hardly ever go out.

OK, let’s start with that. What are the things you believe your neighbors might do should they disapprove of you?

Response:

krisk…@hotmail.com wrote in news:1130143993.118503.14500 @z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com: >> What’s stopping you from not giving a damn? > I guess the fact that I’m human, and most humans care about what other > people think of them. It’s just that my brain is screwed up in that I > care too much about what other people think. > It’s not that I want to ‘not give a damn’ about what other people think > either, that is the other extreme. I would just like to be somewhere in > the middle, like a ‘normal’ person.

Okay, what’s stopping you from doing that? Like, if you decided to spent a whole month doing that–whenever you felt yourself caring too much, you caught yourself and toned it down–what would get in the way?

Response:

"JimSummers" wrote in news:ebd68daf3ee5e987b7c6186235cfbf3e@localhost.talkaboutsupport.com: >>Without it, I see something like Parker’s step 1 as a hopeless >>exercise of > trying to convince oneself by rote of a position which can’t be >>supported rationally. > Exactly, a lot of these people who truly behave as though others > don’t > matter end up raping and killing them and we have a justice system > which puts you in prison if you do that and in prison you have to > answer to other people’s egos too…

Not caring about someone else’s pain and not caring what other people think about you are two different things. Many murderers, particularly the serial variety, have a very keen interest in their public perception. The most recent case around here–BTK–is a perfect example. He spend a few decades drumming himself up in the media.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -LisatheSequel wrote: > Visi Caulk Mah Pnats wrote: > > > Subject line pretty much describes the key to my problems, I > > > think. At least one of the main ones. > > > Alcohol helps to some degree, but not totally. Even when totally > > > pissed I can still feel those inhibitions in the back of my mind. > > > Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years > > > ago and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about > > > 6 months so it’s hard to tell. > > > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about > > > what others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially > > > awkward etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be > > > happy with myself. > > it takes a while to lern not to gibe a shit but it can bee done. > The only cure for that I know of is age and experience. Iow, know > thyself.

yep that is exactly it too —

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> OK, let’s start with that. What are the things you believe your > neighbors might do should they disapprove of you?

Well, they probably wouldn’t do anything, except maybe make comments about me amongst themselves. I also fear that if there is a group of them chatting, and I have to walk near them to get to/from my car, that they’ll taunt me in some way, like saying ‘hi’ in a sarcastic way or something. But in general what worries me is what they think of me and what they say about me behind my back. If I could avoid them completely then I wouldn’t care what they thought of me, but it’s the fact that I often have to walk past them due to the close proximity of our units that makes it a problem. (btw I live in a block of about 20 units/apartments which is why my neighbors are very close by).

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> Okay, what’s stopping you from doing that? Like, if you decided to spent a > whole month doing that–whenever you felt yourself caring too much, you > caught yourself and toned it down–what would get in the way?

I guess it’s the same thing as asking something with OCD to just stop washing their hands constantly. Obviously if they could do that then they wouldn’t have a problem. It’s the same with me – I can’t help but worry about what other people think of me. I tell myself to stop but I just won’t listen!

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what > others thought of me.

Most people worry about this to some extent, otherwise expensive clothing stores and luxury car makers would be out of business. But worrying excessively is obviously not a good thing. What is it that you are afraid people might disapprove of about you? Your shyness? In that case there’s a bit of a catch-22, because that might make you nervous around such people which actually reinforces your shyness. Anyway, one first step to get around this might be to start realizing that nobody is perfect. Not you and not the people who you think might be chatting behind your back. What do you know about those people anyway? What kind of defects and disorders and perversions are they hiding inside their heads? Chances are that mere shyness will seem like utter sanity in comparison… After all, how many chopped-up corpses do *you* have in your refrigerator? Second, if people are chatting about you behind your back, have you ever thought about how much of their time they will be spending doing that? Ten seconds per day? Twenty? It probably isn’t worth obsessing over… as long as they have things in their refrigerators, they’ll have other stuff to worry about than your shyness.

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -CLFan wrote: > krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what > > others thought of me. > Most people worry about this to some extent, otherwise expensive > clothing stores and luxury car makers would be out of business. > But worrying excessively is obviously not a good thing. What is it that > you are afraid people might disapprove of about you? Your shyness? In > that case there’s a bit of a catch-22, because that might make you > nervous around such people which actually reinforces your shyness. > Anyway, one first step to get around this might be to start realizing > that nobody is perfect.

Nitpick– "Realizing" is not an action that can occur through conscious intention; it’s like falling asleep. The actual first step is to *tell* oneself that nobody is perfect, and to *look* for evidence to support that theory, and to repeat this process frequently. A realization will only come about as an indirect result of having gone through this process a number of times, just as falling asleep will only come about as an indirect result of the various steps involved in going to bed.

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You’re right and I know it can be a long process – hence "to start realizing" rather than "to realize". Alternatively, how about "to start and keep reminding yourself that nobody is perfect"?

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > Subject line pretty much describes the key to my problems, I think. At > least one of the main ones. > Alcohol helps to some degree, but not totally. Even when totally pissed > I can still feel those inhibitions in the back of my mind. > Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago > and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months > so it’s hard to tell. > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what > others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward > etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with > myself.

I can’t say enough good things about Paxil. It completely eliminated the uncontrollable thoughts AND the uncomfortable physical feelings associated with them. If Paxil worked somewhat for you, it’s possible you might need something stronger. As for me, it worked 100% literally overnight, but I’m a rare case and also very lucky in that regard. KC

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CLFan wrote: > You’re right and I know it can be a long process – hence "to start > realizing" rather than "to realize". > Alternatively, how about "to start and keep reminding yourself that > nobody is perfect"?

That’s good. "reminding" is something people can actually literally get up and do. It’s only the use of words like "realize" (or "believe") as imperatives that peeves me.

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago > and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months > so it’s hard to tell. > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what > others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward > etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with > myself.

Caring about what others think simply makes you normal. Obsessively thinking about it could be a genetically predisposed problem that could be fixed through various anti-depressants. I can only speak for my own experiences with meds, since I know they work differently for some people, but the combination of klonopin and effexor has done wonders as far as improving my energy level and helping me obsess less with others judging me. I still care about what others think, but for the most part, if something embarssing happens or if I have a faux pas of some sorts, it may bother me at the moment, but by the next day, I’ve either forgotten about it, or don’t care. I work customer service in a call center at a cable company, so almost all the people calling up are calling because they are unhappy, so I have to have thick skin, as I have to deal with lots of angry people who scream and yell about the most trivial things. Honestly, without these meds, there is no way I could have a job like this, as not only to have to act as an emotional punching bag for the company, I have to talk for 8 hours a day. That can be difficult if you have SAD, as you might guess.

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote in news:1130217823.669381.301430@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com: >> Okay, what’s stopping you from doing that? Like, if you decided to >> spent a whole month doing that–whenever you felt yourself caring too >> much, you caught yourself and toned it down–what would get in the >> way? > I guess it’s the same thing as asking something with OCD to just stop > washing their hands constantly. Obviously if they could do that then > they wouldn’t have a problem. It’s the same with me – I can’t help but > worry about what other people think of me. I tell myself to stop but I > just won’t listen!

With an OCD, the perceived consequences of not indulging the compulsion are front and center, so I’m not sure it applies here. With compulsive hand- washing, it may be fear of getting sick, or discomfort with the feeling of dirty hands, or the desire to keep pristine the things one touches, or an infatuation with praise from others for having well-kept hands, or maybe at the extreme end a "deal with the universe" that if you invest lots of time washing you hands good things will happen (and bad things will happen otherwise). Anyway, what I was (askewedly) suggesting is that you be mindful of the reasons behind your particular behavior. Those reasons won’t immediately jump to the fore if they haven’t already, so you’ll have to challenge the behavior by threatening to deny it. If nothing comes up, deny it and see what happens. You’ll probably fumble the first 99 times you try–it’s not magic. Once you figure out why you’re doing it, you’ll be in a better position to figure out what to do to change it.

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—–BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE—– Hash: SHA1 In article <1130276127.911128.18…@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com> The Babaloughesian wrote: >That’s good. "reminding" is something people can actually literally >get up and do. It’s only the use of words like "realize" (or >"believe") as imperatives that peeves me.

Oh, [just] get over it already. – — "IBM has more patent litigation lawyers than SCO has employees." – unknown —–BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE—– Version: GnuPG v1.4.2 (GNU/Linux) Comment: Please fetch my new key 804177F8 from hkp://wwwkeys.eu.pgp.net/ iD8DBQFDYPP2wyMv24BBd/gRAjznAKCVWV825zbrXQTI/75rq2RZ43YDPwCeK9tp 2xENLIyVpJj9/d8PbCoTe/w= =omD3 —–END PGP SIGNATURE—–

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> What’s stopping you from not giving a damn?

I guess the fact that I’m human, and most humans care about what other people think of them. It’s just that my brain is screwed up in that I care too much about what other people think. It’s not that I want to ‘not give a damn’ about what other people think either, that is the other extreme. I would just like to be somewhere in the middle, like a ‘normal’ person.

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True. Too bad it’s so hard to tell exactly where "just enough" ends and "too much" begins. > I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward > etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with > myself.

You think so? I can’t shake the feeling that actual apathy about what other people think would be tantamount to driving down a freeway with a blindfold on. You can be happy about yourself, at least until you crash into something. Not giving a damn about what other people think doesn’t necessarily prepare you for when you crash into the reality that what other people think does at times have practical implications for your life. What prepares you for that, I think, is probably confidence in your basic competence to deal with unforseen consequences when they occur. Call it a combination of an air bag, a seatbelt, and health insurance. I’ve never had that sort of thing myself, but my impression is that that’s the real key to everything. It’s the underlying assumption upon which you can build the other stuff. Without it, I see something like Parker’s step 1 as a hopeless exercise of trying to convince oneself by rote of a position which can’t be supported rationally.

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Visi Caulk Mah Pnats wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->>Subject line pretty much describes the key to my problems, I think. At >>least one of the main ones. >>Alcohol helps to some degree, but not totally. Even when totally >>pissed I can still feel those inhibitions in the back of my mind. >>Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago >>and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months >>so it’s hard to tell. >>My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what >>others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward >>etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with >>myself. > it takes a while to lern not to gibe a shit but it can bee done.

The only cure for that I know of is age and experience. Iow, know thyself.

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> You think so? I can’t shake the feeling that actual apathy about what > other people think would be tantamount to driving down a freeway with a > blindfold on. You can be happy about yourself, at least until you > crash into something. Not giving a damn about what other people think

Yeah maybe I don’t want the other extreme, somewhere in the middle would be nice. Although in certain situations, not giving a damn would be useful, so I could stop worrying about trivial things like what the neighbors must think of me because I never talk to them and hardly ever go out. In those situations my behaviour wouldn’t change (i.e. I wouldn’t start acting like a dickhead) but I would be a hell of a lot happier without the worry.

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > > You think so? I can’t shake the feeling that actual apathy about what > > other people think would be tantamount to driving down a freeway with a > > blindfold on. You can be happy about yourself, at least until you > > crash into something. Not giving a damn about what other people think > Yeah maybe I don’t want the other extreme, somewhere in the middle > would be nice. > Although in certain situations, not giving a damn would be useful, so I > could stop worrying about trivial things like what the neighbors must > think of me because I never talk to them and hardly ever go out. In > those situations my behaviour wouldn’t change (i.e. I wouldn’t start > acting like a dickhead) but I would be a hell of a lot happier without > the worry.

Indeed, some situations, maybe even many situations, carry negligible risks, if any.

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote: > Subject line pretty much describes the key to my problems, I think. At > least one of the main ones. > Alcohol helps to some degree, but not totally. Even when totally > pissed I can still feel those inhibitions in the back of my mind. > Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago > and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months > so it’s hard to tell. > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what > others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward > etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with > myself.

it takes a while to lern not to gibe a shit but it can bee done. —

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote in news:1130111288.774125.46930 @z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com: > Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago > and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months > so it’s hard to tell.

For some. It helps with my depression though not so much with anxiety; however, depression keeps me from interacting with others so I think it does help in that regard. — As for the pastor, after four days of listening to science experts dismantling the case for intelligent design, he was unimpressed. "They’re babblers," said the pastor, the Rev. Jim Grove, who leads a 40-member independent Baptist church outside of Dover. "The more Ph.D.’s you get, it seems like the further away from God you get." (NY Times, 10-2-05)

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krisk…@hotmail.com wrote in news:1130111288.774125.46930 @z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com: > Subject line pretty much describes the key to my problems, I think. At > least one of the main ones. > Alcohol helps to some degree, but not totally. Even when totally pissed > I can still feel those inhibitions in the back of my mind. > Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago > and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months > so it’s hard to tell. > My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what > others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward > etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with > myself.

My method: Step 1: Do you know in your conscious mind that others’ opinions don’t matter? If so, sweet. If not, convince yourself. Step 2: Repeat this knowledge to yourself very frequently. Step 3: Believe it in your gut. It’s not a fast method. A year to make significant progress with this is fantastic.

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What’s stopping you from not giving a damn?

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Subject line pretty much describes the key to my problems, I think. At least one of the main ones. Alcohol helps to some degree, but not totally. Even when totally pissed I can still feel those inhibitions in the back of my mind. Do anti-depressants help with this? I was on Paxil about 6 years ago and I think it did help a bit, but I was only on it for about 6 months so it’s hard to tell. My life would be so much easier if I didn’t care too much about what others thought of me. I mean, I could still be shy, socially awkward etc, but if I didn’t give a damn then at least I’d be happy with myself.

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need help/advice

admin — Mon, 05 Sep 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi, Bob…. I wish I had an answer for you. I guess there comes a point when you have to place your trust in those you have chosen to take care of you… and follow their lead. As noble as it might be, no, most doctors do not make house calls anymore. And when you live a distance away I can understand the problem with logistics. But it seems to me that you *know* what would be best for you right now (ECT)… *If* that is the case, then you have to find the courage to give someone else the control for awhile… and go through with it. Handing over the control to someone else is a scary proposition… I know. But hopefully you have put your trust in the right people… and they can and will assist you. Please keep us posted on how you are doing….. and *never* be afraid to share your thoughts and feelings with the group. Take good care! MikeH

((((Mike)))) (is it ok for me to hug ya?) I feel so nice – knowing what you have been going through in your life, that you find or make the time to be concerned about me. I had a good visit with my therapist yesterday (made it there myself) and I am pretty certain I know what a lot or maybe all of this agoraphobia and anxiety is related to. I just have to keep working to deal with those things. What I really need, I think, is an extended stay in an intensive inpatient program, for a while. This has helped me in the past (over a decade ago). Whether my insurance would be as willing to pay as they were then, I don’t know. And the hospital I was in then, is no longer in existence. Thank You Again, and I read your update – it sounds like you are doing very well! I admire you for coming through this so well, and with courage. Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Jackie, I like your quote. : ) I guess I find myself wondering – I mean I’ve asked various people about a doctor coming to my home, and no one seems to think this is practical or very likely to happen. I did make it to my therapy appointment yesterday, as well as going to the grocery store. I feel like I can be proud of that accomplishment (and I think you would agree). Thanks, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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Margove, while I respect and appreciate your help, I don’t really understand. My doctor has many patients (I don’t know that he has TOO many)…. I do know that his calendar stays pretty full. I’m not sure: 1. How he could devote what would be 2-3 hours to come to see me at my home, and be fair to his other patients. 2. In treatment of Agoraphobia, would my doctor coming to my home be – or WOULDN’T it be… I guess a bit of a statement that it is "Ok" not to go out? I don’t mean "Ok" ethically, of course, I mean healthy. I’d also like to support my doctor by saying that he works holidays (including most Christmases) seeing his patients who are in the hospital. I know that he is at the hospital many days at 7am, and sees patients into the early evening in his office. I *hope* he takes some breaks in the day. He does return my phone pages promptly, and is considerate. I live in a rural area and know some of the other psychiatrists around (there are maybe five) and none of them would do that. I had a psychiatrist once who charged by the minute for "phone consultations." I do think your suggestion about the possibility of a transportation service – whether it is courtesy of the hospital or the government, might be something worthwhile to check into. It might make it possible for me to have ECT’s as an outpatient again. My Dad simply cannot sit and wait in a waiting room for hours due to his health now. Something I’ve been wanting to ask for, but have been a bit ashamed, is whether on really tough days when I have an appointment with my Doc, if I might be allowed to be the next patient he sees when I arrive. I don’t feel this is really fair for other patients who may have been waiting their turn, but hopefully I would not abuse this. It is very difficult for me to sometimes have to wait an hour – especially when his waiting room can often be quite noisy. Thanks again, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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I guess I find myself wondering – I mean I’ve asked various people about a doctor coming to my home, and no one seems to think this is practical or very likely to happen.

When I read my files from the mental health clinic here I found out that it had actually been discussed, soon after I first presented there, amongst staff that I should have home visits by both therapist and Pdoc. What wasn’t in the files was why this never happened. :/ I did make it to my therapy appointment yesterday, as well as going to the grocery store. I feel like I can be proud of that accomplishment (and I think you would agree).

Well done on both counts Bob! Vashti — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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[snip] 2. In treatment of Agoraphobia, would my doctor coming to my home be – or WOULDN’T it be… I guess a bit of a statement that it is "Ok" not to go out? I don’t mean "Ok" ethically, of course, I mean healthy.

I think the idea would be that your doc could accompany you outside. If your doc is too far away maybe there’s a psychiatric nurse or home help organisation who could be enlisted to aid you in desensitising? [snip] Something I’ve been wanting to ask for, but have been a bit ashamed, is whether on really tough days when I have an appointment with my Doc, if I might be allowed to be the next patient he sees when I arrive. I don’t feel this is really fair for other patients who may have been waiting their turn, but hopefully I would not abuse this. It is very difficult for me to sometimes have to wait an hour – especially when his waiting room can often be quite noisy.

I asked at my old mental health centre if there was somewhere quieter I could wait when I wasn’t feeling well, happily there was or I would have had to sit in the stairwell instead. Hope you can find a solution for this Bob! Vashti — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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::I guess I find myself wondering – I mean I’ve asked various people about a ::doctor coming to my home, and no one seems to think this is practical or ::very likely to happen. I understand why you would think this way. I also understand that you live in a very rural area…. which makes this more difficult. I do know someone that was able to have a therapist come to her home. This woman was agoraphobic. The therapist helped her to leave her home again. ::I did make it to my therapy appointment yesterday, as well as going to the ::grocery store. I feel like I can be proud of that accomplishment (and I ::think you would agree). I`m so glad you made it to your appt! It certainly is something to be proud about. I am proud for you too (((((Bob))))) Jackie ~*~Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much~*~ — Helen Keller — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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:::::Gently snipped::::: :: It is very difficult for me to ::sometimes have to wait an hour – especially when his waiting room can often ::be quite noisy. Dear Bob, You could always schedule your appt to be the first one of the day. I do this whenever possible, and most of the time it works. I`ve had appts where I was the first one…… and was in and out within 15 minutes. Jackie ~*~Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much~*~ — Helen Keller — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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You could always schedule your appt to be the first one of the day. I do this whenever possible, and most of the time it works. I`ve had appts where I was the first one…… and was in and out within 15 minutes.

Now that’s a good idea! Vashti — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Bob, I understand how you are feeling about going out at the moment, I am the same way right now. My doctor also wanted to see me face-to-face last year, but after having a huge panic attack in his surgery I couldn’t make myself go. In the end I got my mother to explain how bad I was, he decided to make a home visit, for which I thanked him so much. It was the best consultation I had, I felt more able to express myself and we had a better talk, he suggested seeing a Psychiatrist who had just come to our area, as he felt I needed more specialised care than he could offer. I was worried about how I would go to a Psychiatrist but he explained my problem to the lady and she very kindly also made a home visit. I now work through my own doctor by mail or phone call and he consults with the Psychiatrist. It is such a relief, and now my depression is so much better after increasing my Efexor, next we will try working on my anxiety/Agoraphobia. I hope you can manage to get your doctor to understand or find another doctor who can help. I really do feel for you!! Best wishes, Jude. Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. Thank You, Best to You All, Bob

Thanks Jude. I did make it to my therapy appointment yesterday, and it went well. I don’t feel like I want to "cave in" to this by having people come to me. Maybe it is pride, or maybe it is healthy, I’m not sure which. But I’m very glad that your situation has worked out as well as it has. Thanks, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. I always forced myself to go to the psychiatrist’s office even though I was agoraphobic. Often I had to desensitize myself to the area of his office by driving there in a car several times before the first meeting. When I had to meet a psychiatrist in his 9th floor office, he promised to come down to the lobby and accompany me in the elevator up to his office. After the first few visits in any particular office I became desensitized and felt alot more comfortable. Good luck, Bob! Chip

Thank you Chip! There are a lot of complexities here. Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. Thank You, Best to You All, Bob

I wish I had some suggestions, but I’m at a loss. Just here to support and wish you good luck. Tono — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. Thank You, Best to You All, Bob (((((((((Bob)))))))))))))))) Margrove gave some excellent advice. I have only small episodes of agoraphobia, so I can’t actually answer yours, but there are medications that help. I worry about the ECT. I have so worried I may have to undergo it myself one day. Once I was in the hospital, and a girl had to have it, and afterwards, I asked her, innocently how it went… wrong question, wrong girl. She and her "girlfriend" turned on me, like I was a leper or something. I was trying to be nice, but it backfired on me. I hope you get your agoraphobia under control and get the proper therapy. Keep us posted. It must be bad to have to resort to this type of treatment. Love, Sally

Thank You, ((((Sally))))! Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

The anxiety from the first few trips to the psychiatrist’s office made me physically ill. Like Chip, I drove down there to make sure that I knew where I was supposed to go and how long it would take me. It didn’t help me much with the anxiety of the first few visits. I guess it did help if I consider having the confidence of knowing exactly where I was going. When I had to meet a psychiatrist in his 9th floor office, he promised to come down to the lobby and accompany me in the elevator up to his office. After the first few visits in any particular office I became desensitized and felt alot more comfortable.

Same here. ((((((((Bob))))))))) — Ron P Home Page: http://fp.kwic.com/~rwebb Just remember….if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi, Bob…. I wish I had an answer for you. I guess there comes a point when you have to place your trust in those you have chosen to take care of you… and follow their lead. As noble as it might be, no, most doctors do not make house calls anymore. And when you live a distance away I can understand the problem with logistics. But it seems to me that you *know* what would be best for you right now (ECT)… *If* that is the case, then you have to find the courage to give someone else the control for awhile… and go through with it. Handing over the control to someone else is a scary proposition… I know. But hopefully you have put your trust in the right people… and they can and will assist you. Please keep us posted on how you are doing….. and *never* be afraid to share your thoughts and feelings with the group. Take good care! MikeH – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. Thank You, Best to You All,

. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. Thank You, Best to You All, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

if your ect is absolutely necessary then the facility can send a car to pick you up and pre medicate you so you will be somewhate comfortable getting there-any good doc will make a housecall and any even better doc who knows what agoraphobia can do will continue to write scripts to you indefinetly regardless of script requirements for c4 substances or the pseudo ethical issues of a face to face-you are under his care and that care needs to be responsive to your medical needs-if he cannot comply with the needs of his patients over his own conveniences he isn’t practicing good medicine-finding the right doc is ofetn as arduous as finding the right mate-and like a marriage, your healh is worth the investment to find that right person. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi Bob, I understand how you are feeling about going out at the moment, I am the same way right now. My doctor also wanted to see me face-to-face last year, but after having a huge panic attack in his surgery I couldn’t make myself go. In the end I got my mother to explain how bad I was, he decided to make a home visit, for which I thanked him so much. It was the best consultation I had, I felt more able to express myself and we had a better talk, he suggested seeing a Psychiatrist who had just come to our area, as he felt I needed more specialised care than he could offer. I was worried about how I would go to a Psychiatrist but he explained my problem to the lady and she very kindly also made a home visit. I now work through my own doctor by mail or phone call and he consults with the Psychiatrist. It is such a relief, and now my depression is so much better after increasing my Efexor, next we will try working on my anxiety/Agoraphobia. I hope you can manage to get your doctor to understand or find another doctor who can help. I really do feel for you!! Best wishes, Jude. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Everyone. I know there is a lot going on for a lot of the folks here. I have to ask for help/advice for myself right now. I almost changed my mind about writing this, but I got up some courage. There are so many phobias and situations which I think are related to OCD in my life right now. I am also having spells of serious depression and other things, but I’m needing answers to questions about the phobias and OCD. I made plans yesterday (Sunday) with my doctor who was on call and kind enough to return my phone call quickly and in a friendly manner, to go into the hospital psychiatric unit today, and have ECT’s tomorrow morning. Let’s not get into the ECT question, it is not the point. I am tempted to say "I chickened out" and that is easy to say about myself, but I realize that there may be one or two people here who would not appreciate those type of words. : ) I was afraid to go, that’s better. It turned out the office which was to admit me is closed today anyway, so I couldn’t have done it anyway. My doc is not on call today, but I left a message on the machine at his office. I guess it is agoraphobia. I have had ECT’s several times and I’m not afraid of them. I’m afraid of going out, anywhere. I do seem to manage to get my groceries, thankfully. But my doctor sent me a message, and I know him well enough to know that it was a gentle message, that I must see him in an appointment face-to-face to get any more prescriptions. Please don’t diss my doc for this, a doctor cannot continue sending in prescriptions for a patient who does not show up for appointments. I hope to see my therapist tomorrow, and she is a very good one. But I need much, much more. My question is, What does a person do when they need medical (in this case psychiatric and psychological) help, and is too agoraphobic to go to the appointments? Someone said a while back, the doctor should come to my house. I apologize but I cannot imagine many doctors doing something like that. And it is a 25 mile drive one way, anyway. What does a person do? Any thoughts will be appreciated. Thank You, Best to You All, Bob

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

(((((((((Bob)))))))))))))))) Margrove gave some excellent advice. I have only small episodes of agoraphobia, so I can’t actually answer yours, but there are medications that help. I worry about the ECT. I have so worried I may have to undergo it myself one day. Once I was in the hospital, and a girl had to have it, and afterwards, I asked her, innocently how it went… wrong question, wrong girl. She and her "girlfriend" turned on me, like I was a leper or something. I was trying to be nice, but it backfired on me. I hope you get your agoraphobia under control and get the proper therapy. Keep us posted. It must be bad to have to resort to this type of treatment. Love, Sally — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

I always forced myself to go to the psychiatrist’s office even though I was agoraphobic. Often I had to desensitize myself to the area of his office by driving there in a car several times before the first meeting. When I had to meet a psychiatrist in his 9th floor office, he promised to come down to the lobby and accompany me in the elevator up to his office. After the first few visits in any particular office I became desensitized and felt alot more comfortable. Good luck, Bob! Chip — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Calling Dr. Margrove

admin — Sun, 07 Aug 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Response:

Thank You so much for your wonderful advice, Deirdre. I sure could`ve used it earlier. Unfortunately, I chose to do nothing for the rest of the day but lie here on the sofa and suffer. It`s the reduction in my Adderall that`s affecting me like this, which is sapping all my energy, mostly. I`ve been through it before. Maybe now is not a good time to be weaning myself off the stuff. I`ll have more later, and I`m sorry if… Well, you know. ; ) Bob (Deirdre

still no diagnosis.. but no more zoloft-now celexa

admin — Fri, 01 Jul 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

I went to the head doc today and they still after 3 sessions will not give me any other diagnosis than severe OCD.. and something else - but they never tell me what the something else may be. They had me on zoloft but it made me clench my jaw and I got really bad headaches.. so no more of that.. but celexa instead.. they want to try me on other meds too.. but said they will go over that next visit.. they want to try a bunch of different meds in order to diagnose me.. they say if I respond to certain ones then it will rule out certain disorders .. there is something wrong with that.. the are doing it backwards.. shouldnt you diagnose then treat!? I have to buy a stupid refrigerator.. I am moving and when I paid the deposit and looked over the house, it had one.. it doesnt now, I looked over my paperwork and they list every appliance BUT that.. so I cant argue it.. usually when they have an appliance IN the house when you look at it to rent, unless they tell you otherwise it stays!! I am bent about it. oh well.. AND. I have to move all by myself! no one, including my boyfriend who is moving with me, will help me. AND I have to watch my 6 month old son while I pack and move AND I hava a splinter -Kim

Response:

Moving is last on my list of things I’m able to do by myself. Getting a high paying job would probably tie on that same list. Those doctors are jerkin’ you around with the meds Kim.

Response:

"Caprinardo Delirio" wrote in message

news:11c9k724oll7773@corp.supernews.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I went to the head doc today and they still after 3 sessions will not give > me any other diagnosis than severe OCD.. and something else - but they > never tell me what the something else may be. > They had me on zoloft but it made me clench my jaw and I got really bad > headaches.. so no more of that.. but celexa instead.. they want to try me on > other meds too.. but said they will go over that next visit.. they want to > try a bunch of different meds in order to diagnose me.. they say if I > respond to certain ones then it will rule out certain disorders .. there is > something wrong with that.. the are doing it backwards.. shouldnt you > diagnose then treat!?

Indeed you should, but it is certainly true that you learn things from the response to medication. And the sad fact is that these diagnoses are difficult and often wrong, with lots of trial and error unavoidable. — Nom dePlume, Ph.D. Why, yes, in fact, I am a rocket scientist. Guide to Medications for Mental Illness: http://www.geocities.com/nomdeplume1000/ =====

Response:

OCD hair-pulling

admin — Wed, 22 Jun 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Are there any pills or treatments for this ? I am going crazy. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Are there any pills or treatments for this ?

Yes, there are medications and therapy for OCD. You will have to see a psychiatrist. The hair pulling is called "Trichotillomannia". I am going crazy.

No, you just have a certain problem. I sometimes go through times when my Trichotillomannia acts up. The feeling of pulling my hair feels incredibly good, even if it hurts. Sometimes the more pain the better it feels. It most often acts up when I am over stressed. Tono — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Are there any pills or treatments for this ? I am going crazy.

no not at all-bald maybe? The antidepressant meds may help as can cbt therapy-it is treated as a compulsion and those meds that do better for ocd are used-zoloft, prozac, anafranil, wellbutrin, yadda-go see a psychiatrist and then a cognitive therapist — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Are there any pills or treatments for this ? I am going crazy.

No, you’re not. Find a psychologist for *cognitive behavioral therapy* which can be amazingly effective and doesn’t take forever to have some progress. There are meds for this (mainly the SSRI antidepressants and the older TCA Anafranil) which may support therapy. Philip — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

::Are there any pills or treatments for this ? :: ::I am going crazy. Dear Paul, You are NOT going crazy!! There is help for this but you need to see a psychiatrist for that help. Please call one as soon as possible. If that`s not possible, than a good starting point would be your MD. Good luck!! Jackie ~*~I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster lately. The other

Response:

holistic approach to mental health

admin — Sat, 18 Jun 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Sorry for my English I urge people who have not responded favorably to meds to try holistic approach to mental health . The idea is to not be right here ( including me). The idea is to be happy . The idea is to look at the past , look at the present and say to yourself what if instead of buying into the different forms of paid therapy and meds. Therapy can help take the guilt away from bad childhood and empower someone but it will not take away the OCD or panic or GAD. Lifestly can . – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – while many people are stuck in different places in their lives here, to me the most defining element in mental illness is the sometimes total lack of confidence that is the result. I have watched in unwelcome marvel at the power anxiety had over me , including knowing the differences between how I would like to be perceived and the reality in how I was actually perceived. ( which is sort of like having to watch life go by without you ) . I have watched as anxiety had power over me instead of me having power over it. To me , anxiety is like a constant reminder of powerful over powerless and the most optimistic thing is , I think there are ways to overcome this dependency on the things we don’t like or we use to feel powerless over including not being dependent on medication or thewrong values. So many people right now on this message board , its about being right and overcoming this helplessness by scoring a plus in name calling game or explaining things that just are so opposite what needs to be explained. So many people can’t see in themselves , its not about scoring points over someone else and to many people here this is the only way they feel powerful sadly enough . Rather is about understanding how things are connected in positive world. What feel right and what is right is often very different. So to me I think I am on the right journey and even if I was more reactive to certain stimuli in the past, the criteria I use to defeat anxiety is the same criteria I think the rest of world could easily exist in but then like I alluded to before , how many people would just be happy in the spiritual world and not the material world. So anxiety maybe nothing more then a lifestyle that needs changing.. Anxiety is often like thinking or was like thinking, that there is part of self that is self defeating the other, like trying to understand the craziness of why things are not easier or in unison. It gets to be even more desperate when we can’t find any answers. To me the surreal is how I see anxiety and as much as one can explain surreal one can explain anxiety. Spirit and balance and consistency will lead people to better path. while other evolve here including myself and think for a decent percent of population, holistic health will improve outlook and happiness where or if other things like medication fail. If you were like me and meds never ever seemed to do much more then temporarily relax you, it might do better to look at lifestyle and of course environment in bringing about change. Environmnet meaning the family relationship and how it affected your being and even the environment in which you exist today such as air quality and friends you choose.

Response:

while many people are stuck in different places in their lives here, to me the most defining element in mental illness is the sometimes total lack of confidence that is the result. I have watched in unwelcome marvel at the power anxiety had over me , including knowing the differences between how I would like to be perceived and the reality in how I was actually perceived. ( which is sort of like having to watch life go by without you ) . I have watched as anxiety had power over me instead of me having power over it. To me , anxiety is like a constant reminder of powerful over powerless and the most optimistic thing is , I think there are ways to overcome this dependency on the things we don’t like or we use to feel powerless over including not being dependent on medication or thewrong values. So many people right now on this message board , its about being right and overcoming this helplessness by scoring a plus in name calling game or explaining things that just are so opposite what needs to be explained. So many people can’t see in themselves , its not about scoring points over someone else and to many people here this is the only way they feel powerful sadly enough . Rather is about understanding how things are connected in positive world. What feel right and what is right is often very different. So to me I think I am on the right journey and even if I was more reactive to certain stimuli in the past, the criteria I use to defeat anxiety is the same criteria I think the rest of world could easily exist in but then like I alluded to before , how many people would just be happy in the spiritual world and not the material world. So anxiety maybe nothing more then a lifestyle that needs changing.. Anxiety is often like thinking or was like thinking, that there is part of self that is self defeating the other, like trying to understand the craziness of why things are not easier or in unison. It gets to be even more desperate when we can’t find any answers. To me the surreal is how I see anxiety and as much as one can explain surreal one can explain anxiety. Spirit and balance and consistency will lead people to better path. while other evolve here including myself and think for a decent percent of population, holistic health will improve outlook and happiness where or if other things like medication fail. If you were like me and meds never ever seemed to do much more then temporarily relax you, it might do better to look at lifestyle and of course environment in bringing about change. Environmnet meaning the family relationship and how it affected your being and even the environment in which you exist today such as air quality and friends you choose.

Response:

bad news – but GOOD news too!

admin — Wed, 15 Jun 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi folks, I did something (good news first, heheh) very positive and I pulled it off with great success, yesterday. Tuesday is the day of the week my doc practices at the town which is nearer to me (and less populated, so easier for me that way too). I phoned the young lady who schedules his appointments, etc, and asked if there had been a cancellation – whatever – and that I thought it would be a good time for me to see him. (I don’t think I told you folks that I missed my last appointment). She asked him if he could see me, and he said yes. I went in quite late (but it is light pretty late now) and – well – I WENT! And I think it was a good meeting. We decided that I was having OCD in an attempt to control anxiety (like Margrove said, I think, about avoiding) and I am going to stop Effexor and start Anaphranil (if I spelled it right). Some may know that is an antidepressant which is supposed to help OCD. Also, I’m going back on Abilify (my suggestion, and he liked it). It really was a helpful meeting. The bad news – and even this, I survived : ) – leaving to drive home, my car (a very old one) went haywire, and left me unable to move, in the turn lane at a busy (small town) intersection. Can you imagine many things which would be as anxiety-provoking? And also the realization that I couldn’t get myself straight home. I was stranded "out". I think I handled it pretty well. The car only cost me $400 and it made some really ugly noises (I’m *not* a mechanic) so I suspect it is a goner. I don’t know what I’m going to do about that. The last thing I really need right now is an "excuse" not to go anywhere I’d have to drive to. We’ll see. So that is my news for today. I credit you folks for helping me through this, and helping me have the strength to make that appointment, and get to it. Thank you. Best to all, Bob

Yes, well done for making it to the appointment, Bob. It sounds really positive. I remember about 20 or so years ago when I joined a postal agoraphobia newsgroup that Anafranil was all the rage for dealing with anxiety states. It was very effective and many people found it alleviated their symptoms and got them going out again. So it’s a very tried and tested med and I wish you lots of success in using it. Shame about the car, but well done for coping. We very often do when we HAVE to. All the best and onward and upwards. Steve. — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Oh Bob, so sorry about your car!!! I’m glad, though, that you made it to your doctor’s appointment. Good for you! Treat yourself to something special now. {{{{{Bob}}}}} Di

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Bob, I haven’t posted about it here, but I have been having bouts of agoraphobia the last few weeks. I purposely look for reasons to have to go out, I am fighting it, I don’t want it to take over. I am so glad you got out and saw your doctor. I don’t know anything about Anaphranil, but Effexor was just horrible for me, in fact I’m blaming the agoraphobia on it. I’ve never been agoraphobic in my life until I took Effexor. I hope the new med works for you, keep us posted. About your car dying in the turn lane, I am so sorry that happened to you. How anxiety provoking. I don’t know a thing about cars, I am at the mercy of my car and an occasional mechanic. I hope you get a new car soon, or get that one fixed. My best wishes, and congrats. Sally

Hi Sally! I am tardy in returning – not unusual for me. I am not responding to everyone, just too much, but I wanted to say Hi and Good Luck and Thanks and all that, to you, because I don’t think I know you. Let’s both Be Well! Best, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi folks, I did something (good news first, heheh) very positive and I pulled it off with great success, yesterday.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi folks, I did something (good news first, heheh) very positive and I pulled it off with great success, yesterday. Tuesday is the day of the week my doc practices at the town which is nearer to me (and less populated, so easier for me that way too). I phoned the young lady who schedules his appointments, etc, and asked if there had been a cancellation – whatever – and that I thought it would be a good time for me to see him. (I don’t think I told you folks that I missed my last appointment). She asked him if he could see me, and he said yes. I went in quite late (but it is light pretty late now) and – well – I WENT! And I think it was a good meeting. We decided that I was having OCD in an attempt to control anxiety (like Margrove said, I think, about avoiding) and I am going to stop Effexor and start Anaphranil (if I spelled it right). Some may know that is an antidepressant which is supposed to help OCD. Also, I’m going back on Abilify (my suggestion, and he liked it). It really was a helpful meeting. The bad news – and even this, I survived : ) – leaving to drive home, my car (a very old one) went haywire, and left me unable to move, in the turn lane at a busy (small town) intersection. Can you imagine many things which would be as anxiety-provoking? And also the realization that I couldn’t get myself straight home. I was stranded "out". I think I handled it pretty well. The car only cost me $400 and it made some really ugly noises (I’m *not* a mechanic) so I suspect it is a goner. I don’t know what I’m going to do about that. The last thing I really need right now is an "excuse" not to go anywhere I’d have to drive to. We’ll see. So that is my news for today. I credit you folks for helping me through this, and helping me have the strength to make that appointment, and get to it. Thank you. Best to all, Bob

Bob, I haven’t posted about it here, but I have been having bouts of agoraphobia the last few weeks. I purposely look for reasons to have to go out, I am fighting it, I don’t want it to take over. I am so glad you got out and saw your doctor. I don’t know anything about Anaphranil, but Effexor was just horrible for me, in fact I’m blaming the agoraphobia on it. I’ve never been agoraphobic in my life until I took Effexor. I hope the new med works for you, keep us posted. About your car dying in the turn lane, I am so sorry that happened to you. How anxiety provoking. I don’t know a thing about cars, I am at the mercy of my car and an occasional mechanic. I hope you get a new car soon, or get that one fixed. My best wishes, and congrats. Sally — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi, Bob, Sounds like a positive appointment with your pdoc. Good job on making the call also. I think you did a great job in dealing with the car situation. Sorry about the car and the cost but on the other hand you proved to yourself that you are able to handle a situation as anxiety provoking as this. BIG pat on the back… Keep on keepin’ on, Bob!!! smiles, Elise

– The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Hi Bob, Thanks for sharing. Good for you that you made it to the doctor’s, I hope your new meds will help. I was on Anafranil with great success for about nine years until it pooped out on me. Even your bad news about the scary moments in the car and the poor thing itself

Response:

Hi folks, I did something (good news first, heheh) very positive and I pulled it off with great success, yesterday. Tuesday is the day of the week my doc practices at the town which is nearer to me (and less populated, so easier for me that way too). I phoned the young lady who schedules his appointments, etc, and asked if there had been a cancellation – whatever – and that I thought it would be a good time for me to see him. (I don’t think I told you folks that I missed my last appointment). She asked him if he could see me, and he said yes. I went in quite late (but it is light pretty late now) and – well – I WENT! And I think it was a good meeting. We decided that I was having OCD in an attempt to control anxiety (like Margrove said, I think, about avoiding) and I am going to stop Effexor and start Anaphranil (if I spelled it right). Some may know that is an antidepressant which is supposed to help OCD. Also, I’m going back on Abilify (my suggestion, and he liked it). It really was a helpful meeting. The bad news – and even this, I survived : ) – leaving to drive home, my car (a very old one) went haywire, and left me unable to move, in the turn lane at a busy (small town) intersection. Can you imagine many things which would be as anxiety-provoking? And also the realization that I couldn’t get myself straight home. I was stranded "out". I think I handled it pretty well. The car only cost me $400 and it made some really ugly noises (I’m *not* a mechanic) so I suspect it is a goner. I don’t know what I’m going to do about that. The last thing I really need right now is an "excuse" not to go anywhere I’d have to drive to. We’ll see. So that is my news for today. I credit you folks for helping me through this, and helping me have the strength to make that appointment, and get to it. Thank you. Best to all, Bob — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Well done for taking control Bob! I’m so glad to see that the appointment proved helpful to you. The bad news – and even this, I survived : ) – leaving to drive home, my car (a very old one) went haywire, and left me unable to move, in the turn lane at a busy (small town) intersection. Can you imagine many things which would be as anxiety-provoking? And also the realization that I couldn’t get myself straight home. I was stranded "out". I think I handled it pretty well. The car only cost me $400 and it made some really ugly noises (I’m *not* a mechanic) so I suspect it is a goner. I don’t know what I’m going to do about that. The last thing I really need right now is an "excuse" not to go anywhere I’d have to drive to. We’ll see.

I can imagine that this was an anxiety provoking situation Bob. Remember that you did survive it ok. Yes, it was an anxious time, but you sound as if you handled it ok. Well done Matey! I hope that you can get the car going again. Your mechanical knowledge sounds as good as mine. Personally, I think *ugly noises* was a mechanical description So that is my news for today. I credit you folks for helping me through this, and helping me have the strength to make that appointment, and get to it. Thank you.

I take none of the credit Bob. Firstly, I haven’t been posting any support lately and secondly, it’s *you* that’s dealing with it all. In my books, you’re doing well! Love from Caz — The charter is available at: http://readystump.algebra.com/~asapm

Response:

Guilty/depressed for the past week and a half…

admin — Sun, 12 Jun 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Question:

Dear Laurie, I have felt that way. Just no motivation. It is something I work on almost daily and some days are better than others. Since I changed meds I have felt more motivated in the past month than I have in 5 years, especially around the house. If you don’t start feeling better, you really should mention this to your doctor. You don’t need depression on top of everything else you are having to deal with. I do hope you feel better. Vicki

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I have been in a funk. Depressed a bit, but able to pull myself out of it. I did have one bad night this past week… but I survived it. And I mean *survived* it because Joe was OOT. So I thought long and hard what could be troubling me, other than Mom’s cancer and things that are ever present. And I found out what it is. I’m guilt ridden. I’m feeling guilty b/c I haven’t unpacked yet from rehab (got home on 4/6). The suitcase is still in the hallway upstairs. It’s been opened, rifled through, picked through, etc., but not unpacked. And (this is the worst of it), both of my spare bedrooms have the doors closed. Why? Because there are clothes/shoes/purses EVERY WHERE. I went into the one room where the Christmas wrapping is (which is still out from 12/04), and I found 3 presents Mom gave me that I completely forgot about. You have to step over SO much crap.