Sad News…
Question:
I lost my mother in 1995. We were never close but it hurt like hell to lose her. It is never easy to lose one’s mother; no matter what the status of the relationship is. My heart truly goes out to you. Just remember that grief is a healing process and that time heals all wounds. Love, Lynne – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -<uglym…@cosmic.com> wrote in message news:3d82bac6.57100857@nntp… > Today I learned that my mother died. For many years she > was estranged from me and my sister (and the rest of her > family) because of mental illness. > No matter what me or my sister did to try to help, it was > all for naught. We fought and fought and fought to help, > but mother would have none of it. The health care system > in the place I live in wouldn’t help. The most they could do > is commit her for 72 hours, and if, at the end of those 72 hours > she was deemed not to be an imminent danger to herself > or others, she would be released. > Yet my sister and I lived with the knowledge that no > matter what we did, this day would come. Still, that > sense of anticipation did nothing to prepare > us for the shock of our mother’s death. Strangely enough, > two nights ago I dreamt of my mother and told her how much I missed > her. > For the longest time I lived with the faint hope that maybe > someday things would change and my mother would let > me or my sister help her get herself straightened out. > That hope and chance has slipped through my fingers… > and now it’s gone… forever. If I could get all the gold in the > world and buy her life back, and all those chances and hopes, > I would, and I would do absolutely anything to make all of that > happen. If I could only turn back the hands of time… > The irrevocability of my mother’s death makes me realize what the > true meaning of infinity is. I can’t seem to find the words to express > how I feel right now. Losing my mother is like having something very > precious torn away from me as I’m cut adrift in a vast, empty sea. > The sense of aloneness is terrible. > The only saving grace in all of this is that my mother is now free of > whatever demons were tormenting her, and free of whatever > pain she was suffering. And as for me and my sister, we can > take solace in remembering her as she was before she got > sick. > I loved my mother so very much that her passing has filled me with > a quality of pain and loss that seems infinite and beyond telling. At > the same time, her passing doesn’t seem real. Part of me still wants > to pick up the phone and call her, as though nothing had happened. > And after today, nothing in my life will ever be the same as it once > was. Goodbye, Mother. If you’re now in the afterlife, looking down > upon us as we grieve, I hope you know how very dearly you were > loved… and how much you will be missed.
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…what’s sad is that we’re your outlet for this.
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On Sat, 14 Sep 2002 05:18:50 GMT, "DraMATTics" <matts…@cox.net> wrote: >sarrow.
….is that somekind of bird?
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….that sounds like an Irish song….hey everyone!, drinks are on the house!!! Ohhhhhhhhh Daaaaaaaannyyyyyyyyy booooyyyyyy…. On Sat, 14 Sep 2002 07:49:34 GMT, "Alliekatt" – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -<alleykat…@hotmail.com> wrote: >> <uglym…@cosmic.com> wrote in message news:3d82bac6.57100857@nntp… >> > Today I learned that my mother died. For many years she >> > was estranged from me and my sister (and the rest of her >> > family) because of mental illness. >The man I spent 4 years of my life loving and engaged to, died about five >years ago, in a psychotic rage brought on by a combination of severe OCD, >schizophrenia and sociopathy, caused by swelling of the brain in a rare form >of MS. He was healthy when I met him, but I had abandoned him 2 years prior >to his death. After 4 years of increasing mental decrepitude, he was too >much to handle and too bizarre to take. I did what I could. >> > No matter what me or my sister did to try to help, it was >> > all for naught. We fought and fought and fought to help, >> > but mother would have none of it. >I did as well for him. Then he tried to kill me and that was the end of it, >and still the mental health authorities and police did nothing until it was >too late. I worked graveyard shift in a battered women’s shelter and a >hospice in order to stay safe. >> > That hope and chance has slipped through my fingers… >> > and now it’s gone… forever. If I could get all the gold in the >> > world and buy her life back, and all those chances and hopes, >> > I would, and I would do absolutely anything to make all of that >> > happen. If I could only turn back the hands of time… >I spent 1998 drunk thinking that I could have changed things "if I had only >knew" or "if I had the courage". It ends up being a monologue that does >nothing but torment. Time is what it is, we eventually break down and >wither like any other living thing. But the breaking down and withering of >the soul is more heartbreaking than any cancer, especially of someone you >trusted and loved as a young child. And the premature breakdown of a >person’s life is the greatest unfairness of all. You could do nothing, and >that is not your fault. It might be a while before you genuinely believe >it. >> > And after today, nothing in my life will ever be the same as it once >> > was. Goodbye, Mother. If you’re now in the afterlife, looking down >> > upon us as we grieve, I hope you know how very dearly you were >> > loved… and how much you will be missed. >I may be pitiless, however I have plenty of sympathy. I hope that you and >your perspective will take all this in stride, and use it to grow and >become, in wisdom and strength.
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<uglym…@cosmic.com> wrote in message news:3d82bac6.57100857@nntp… > Today I learned that my mother died. <cut>
I can feel you pain. 18 months ago my father died in a carcrash, entirely his fault + no seat belt fastened. For a month or two after his death i could feel his presence, i was driving my car and i had this feeling that he’s there on a passenger seat, and you know what? I talked to him, i talked to him aloud whe i was alone and talked to him in my mind when in public. And this helped. I asked him for advice, for help and somehow i received it, this was strange, suddenly a thought in my head appeared and it brought a solution. Then the feeling of his close presence was gone. But i still feel he’s there and watching me and helping me. So talk to your mom, talk to her as if she was alive, she can hear you, she really can. — lukas3339
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My mum is in hospital now. Operation followed by infection, thankfully apparently clearing up now. Heading over to UK on Monday. Not much I can say. You’ve no idea what such things feel like until they happen. Or perhaps a very small idea when you fear they might, but only very small. Bereavement and handling of grief is a long process,don’t expect it to be over quickly. But try and make it easy on yourself any way you know how. You owe that to yourself and her. Best wishes B <uglym…@cosmic.com> escribi
