Bothered by depression today
Question:
Hello All, Does anyone find that they get just so tired of having these thoughts that it’s really depressing? On most days I am able to just muddle through and say "o.k., I have OCD, I’m going to let that thought go." But on others, like today, I just get so weary and sad. Like, I’m so very tired of thinking these bizarre/violent things all the time. I so much want to be a loving and gentle person, and these thoughts depress me. I cancelled the appt. with my therapist today because I have been sooo busy at work (good distraction) but I can’t put off telling her I want to stop seeing her. And I need to find someone who specializes. I guess I’m just looking for others who feel as weary as I do so I won’t feel alone. Jane
Response:
Hi Jane, I often have days where my OCD gives me depression. I worked so hard at learning how to manage it and I feel like I’m slipping. I don’t want those "mind games" to control my life again. When I’m really depressed, I have no energy or ambition. Most of the time, I’m depressed, but it’s just a matter of degrees. Some days I’m a little depressed, some days more depressed, a few days very depressed. I hope your depression lifts soon and that you’ll have the courage to tell your therapist that it’s time for you to move on to another therapist. John DANDB97 <dand…@aol.comnojunk> wrote in article <20000413000627.29479.00001…@ng-fp1.aol.com>… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hello All, > Does anyone find that they get just so tired of having these thoughts that it’s > really depressing? On most days I am able to just muddle through and say "o.k., > I have OCD, I’m going to let that thought go." But on others, like today, I > just get so weary and sad. Like, I’m so very tired of thinking these > bizarre/violent things all the time. I so much want to be a loving and gentle > person, and these thoughts depress me. > I cancelled the appt. with my therapist today because I have been sooo busy at > work (good distraction) but I can’t put off telling her I want to stop seeing > her. And I need to find someone who specializes. > I guess I’m just looking for others who feel as weary as I do so I won’t feel > alone. > Jane
Response:
Hi Jane. Don’t feel alone. I’m sure we have all felt that way at some point. I am 30, and I have had OCD since I was around 7 or 8, maybe younger. I have lived with it the whole time, and for the most part I have ‘gotten used to it’. As a matter of fact, when I imagine not having it I freak out. Please remember- you are a good , gentle person. Remember that you have a chemical disorder, and it isn’t your fault. I wouldn’t stop therapy, not until you have found the specialist that you want . But that’s just my opinion. But, do what is best for you. Take care, and remember that you are not alone. -Kathryn in Georgia "DANDB97" <dand…@aol.comnojunk> wrote in message
news:20000413000627.29479.00001310@ng-fp1.aol.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hello All, > Does anyone find that they get just so tired of having these thoughts that it’s > really depressing? On most days I am able to just muddle through and say "o.k., > I have OCD, I’m going to let that thought go." But on others, like today, I > just get so weary and sad. Like, I’m so very tired of thinking these > bizarre/violent things all the time. I so much want to be a loving and gentle > person, and these thoughts depress me. > I cancelled the appt. with my therapist today because I have been sooo busy at > work (good distraction) but I can’t put off telling her I want to stop seeing > her. And I need to find someone who specializes. > I guess I’m just looking for others who feel as weary as I do so I won’t feel > alone. > Jane
Response:
Jane, I often feel the same way. About your therapist, you have a right to see anyone you want to. Be honest and tell your therapist that you need to leave.
Response:
Jane, You are not alone. I get tired and depressed a lot. Like you said, some days are better than others. I hope you start having more better days! Good luck finding a new specialist. It definately makes all the difference. Take Care, Gretchen DANDB97 <dand…@aol.comnojunk> wrote in message
news:20000413000627.29479.00001310@ng-fp1.aol.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hello All, > Does anyone find that they get just so tired of having these thoughts that it’s > really depressing? On most days I am able to just muddle through and say "o.k., > I have OCD, I’m going to let that thought go." But on others, like today, I > just get so weary and sad. Like, I’m so very tired of thinking these > bizarre/violent things all the time. I so much want to be a loving and gentle > person, and these thoughts depress me. > I cancelled the appt. with my therapist today because I have been sooo busy at > work (good distraction) but I can’t put off telling her I want to stop seeing > her. And I need to find someone who specializes. > I guess I’m just looking for others who feel as weary as I do so I won’t feel > alone. > Jane
Response:
Hello All, Felt a little better today. It’s weird how some days are good, others not so good. Mostly I find that if I do happen to be in an o.k. mood, my brain will suddenly search for and find an OCD thought. Like if I realize that I’m feeling fine and not thinking about it, my brain will be like "Uh oh, better get those wheels turning and come up with something." It’s like I "forget" temporarily that I have it, then it hits me again. Often, just the very fact that I have these problems is enough to make me feel bad. Like "Oh, yeah, you’re happy now, but remember- you have violent thoughts and are probably really crazy, so don’t get too relaxed." It’s frustrating! Thanks everyone for your support… Jane
Response:
Hi Jane, I am glad you are feeling better. I have days like that, too- some days are better than others. And in the course of a day I find my mood changes, also. If you’re feeling good, and your OCD kicks in, well, try to remember that it’s just the disease talking. (Easier said than done, believe me, I know). You have every right to feel happy. 
Take care. -Kathryn in Georgia – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hello All, > Felt a little better today. It’s weird how some days are good, others not so > good. Mostly I find that if I do happen to be in an o.k. mood, my brain will > suddenly search for and find an OCD thought. Like if I realize that I’m feeling > fine and not thinking about it, my brain will be like "Uh oh, better get those > wheels turning and come up with something." It’s like I "forget" temporarily > that I have it, then it hits me again. Often, just the very fact that I have > these problems is enough to make me feel bad. Like "Oh, yeah, you’re happy now, > but remember- you have violent thoughts and are probably really crazy, so don’t > get too relaxed." It’s frustrating! > Thanks everyone for your support… > Jane
Response:
If you were serious about what you said, I feel the exact same way as you do. You’re not alone. I don’t even want to go to sleep at night sometimes because of the thoughts I have. That I might hurt somebody. I heard that in Florida they’re testing a new drug on a guy that has helped him with his OCD very much. It’s actually a pain killer too. Maybe eventually they’ll have it for everyone. I know I need it. Debra
Response:
Do you or anyone know anything about this drug? Where did you hear about this? — Take care of your "self". whatatrip rbol…@eburg.com "Sonic" <dcste…@webtv.net> wrote in message
news:937-38F7CAA1-65@storefull-161.iap.bryant.webtv.net… > If you were serious about what you said, I feel the exact same way as > you do. You’re not alone. I don’t even want to go to sleep at night > sometimes because of the thoughts I have. That I might hurt somebody. I > heard that in Florida they’re testing a new drug on a guy that has > helped him with his OCD very much. It’s actually a pain killer too. > Maybe eventually they’ll have it for everyone. I know I need it. Debra
—–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–== Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–
Response:
"Sonic" <dcste…@webtv.net> wrote in message
news:937-38F7CAA1-65@storefull-161.iap.bryant.webtv.net… > If you were serious about what you said, I feel the exact same way as > you do. You’re not alone. I don’t even want to go to sleep at night > sometimes because of the thoughts I have. That I might hurt somebody. I > heard that in Florida they’re testing a new drug on a guy that has > helped him with his OCD very much. It’s actually a pain killer too. > Maybe eventually they’ll have it for everyone. I know I need it. Debra
Thanks to Maryth, the name of the drug is Ultram. It was approved in 1995 as an analgesic. The company will not try to get approval for use for OCD because they don’t think it is worth the money. But doctors can prescribe if for you even though it is not approved for OCD. Just because it had not been tested by the FDA does not mean it doesn’t work problems other than pain relief. It is a synthetic opiate so those who have had addiction problems with opiates may have problems with Ultram. — Take care of your "self". whatatrip rbol…@eburg.com —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–== Over 80,000 Newsgroups – 16 Different Servers! =—–
Response:
Hey Debra, Yes, I totally feel that way, and now what I’ve been doing is constructing these frightening elaborate scenarios in my mind and then obsessing about them. Like- what if someone (not me) breaks into my mom’s house and kills her, and there’s no solid evidence of who did it, and my therapist thinks I did it, and she gets me arrested and then testifies against me and tells everything I’ve said in therapy? For sure the jury would convict me, since I’ve said "I’ve had thoughts that involve being afraid of killing my mother." Then I think about going to jail and my life being over and just getting old and dying in jail alone. Then I think of all the things I’ve said to people that could convict me, like joking things. For example, my mother had put into her will that I wasn’t to get anything from her estate until I was 30. Well, once I said in front of the whole family, totally joking of course, "When I turn 30, you better watch out!" Everyone laughed of course, but now I’m like "What if they remember that and then testify against me in this murder trail?" Anyway, the whole thing is extremely depressing. It’s very hard to relax because if I’m not worried about the actual thoughts, I’m worried about their possible effect on me and especially getting sent to jail for something I didn’t do. Of course, I know deep down that this whole scenario is very unlikely, but that doesn’t stop me from worrying about it. Regards, Jane
