We are all Heroes
Question:
I just wanted to comment that of course most of us have bipolar and many of us have additional diagnoses as well that we are dealing with. We have all been in the trenches, suffered tremendously, many of us have experienced severe depression and mania, suicidal ideation, horrible panic attacks, intense anxiety etc. I really think that due to having the problems we have, we have developed coping skills superior to most people who do not have "problems with their brains." We KNOW what it’s like to suffer from what we have on top of trying to life a "regular" life as it is. Many of us KNOW what the "dark night of the soul" is – we have been there or are there now. We have experienced emotions, fears, anxieties, etc. more intensely than most people. We may feel beaten up inside sometimes but we all are really fighters, survivors. I believe that when "messes" come in our lives, that we are better able to work through these "messes" than many others who go through life without their body betraying them. We have become stronger people from being in these trenches. We KNOW that we can and will survive as we have been through much worse. Many of us have come not to trust Drs. or others in the mental health community. Many of us have had to suffer longer due to misinformation, lack of information and unprofessionalism in this mental health community. Some of us have been fortunate and have found a pdoc who really knows what he/she is doing and we have felt relief sooner. We have learned that we are not alone – that there are many other sufferers out there like us. We have found we have many similarities and we have found that we are not weak. Many of us have been forced to take on the role of "Dr.", constantly learning new information about our disorders as many Drs. are so unaware. We have done this as we are determined to grow and to silence our suffering. We are all heroes. Heroes because, for one, we ARE HERE. We have survived. We ARE surviving. We are strong. As I said earlier, our bodies have betrayed us, through no will of our own. We did not ask for it, deserve it or cause it. We are all faced with tremendous challenge and we all are fighting back. We are heroes and we deserve medals for our courage and our fortitude. Patty
Response:
Phil, I loved your poem! Patty – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Yes I agree. It also make for vivid poetry The Diamond In silent dark the diamond lies No hint of light, no song it cries Yet once the sight can set it free That all they ask is what they see Enraptured in its brilliant glow A song to sing, a seed to sow A tune that only they will know Cause different lights bring different shades When light is gone the colur fades Yet many lights can bring forth one Refracting flames reflect the sun The diamond shines bright forth its light To drive the demons from its sight Too bright a light to filter fright They flee in fear to seek the night And left alone the diamond glows The inner light slows down and shows All the colours that it knows. And stable on a steady glow It shines its light for all to know No more to hide the pride inside It grasps the moon to stop the tide To venture forth and taste the air And stay the demons in their lair The light is steady, white and bright To shield the weaker from the night And on the path that lies ahead The diamond shines its light instead
Response:
Yes I agree. It also make for vivid poetry The Diamond In silent dark the diamond lies No hint of light, no song it cries Yet once the sight can set it free That all they ask is what they see Enraptured in its brilliant glow A song to sing, a seed to sow A tune that only they will know Cause different lights bring different shades When light is gone the colur fades Yet many lights can bring forth one Refracting flames reflect the sun The diamond shines bright forth its light To drive the demons from its sight Too bright a light to filter fright They flee in fear to seek the night And left alone the diamond glows The inner light slows down and shows All the colours that it knows. And stable on a steady glow It shines its light for all to know No more to hide the pride inside It grasps the moon to stop the tide To venture forth and taste the air And stay the demons in their lair The light is steady, white and bright To shield the weaker from the night And on the path that lies ahead The diamond shines its light instead – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I just wanted to comment that of course most of us have bipolar and many of us have additional diagnoses as well that we are dealing with. We have all been in the trenches, suffered tremendously, many of us have experienced severe depression and mania, suicidal ideation, horrible panic attacks, intense anxiety etc. I really think that due to having the problems we have, we have developed coping skills superior to most people who do not have "problems with their brains." We KNOW what it’s like to suffer from what we have on top of trying to life a "regular" life as it is. Many of us KNOW what the "dark night of the soul" is – we have been there or are there now. We have experienced emotions, fears, anxieties, etc. more intensely than most people. We may feel beaten up inside sometimes but we all are really fighters, survivors. I believe that when "messes" come in our lives, that we are better able to work through these "messes" than many others who go through life without their body betraying them. We have become stronger people from being in these trenches. We KNOW that we can and will survive as we have been through much worse. Many of us have come not to trust Drs. or others in the mental health community. Many of us have had to suffer longer due to misinformation, lack of information and unprofessionalism in this mental health community. Some of us have been fortunate and have found a pdoc who really knows what he/she is doing and we have felt relief sooner. We have learned that we are not alone – that there are many other sufferers out there like us. We have found we have many similarities and we have found that we are not weak. Many of us have been forced to take on the role of "Dr.", constantly learning new information about our disorders as many Drs. are so unaware. We have done this as we are determined to grow and to silence our suffering. We are all heroes. Heroes because, for one, we ARE HERE. We have survived. We ARE surviving. We are strong. As I said earlier, our bodies have betrayed us, through no will of our own. We did not ask for it, deserve it or cause it. We are all faced with tremendous challenge and we all are fighting back. We are heroes and we deserve medals for our courage and our fortitude. Patty
Response:
Patty, I don’t feel like a heroe at all. Rather like a thousand pieces of whirling energy reaching no particular destination except my own destruction. I take no pride in surviving this disease. It would have been better not to have been born than to suffer in such a meaningless way. You can try and make this a heroic situation but I find it miserable and senseless. I don’t need heroes. I want cures.
